Today’s action-packed Minka scene reminded me of a SCORE magazine “Boob Beat” story I did in 2005. There was an Italian sexologist named Piero Lorenzoni who compared fruits to a woman’s breasts and personality. Okay, his theory may have been a little bananas, but that’s what they said about Newton.
Senor Lorenzoni broke it down like this:
A women with breasts like melons may look maternal but isn’t. Said Lorenzoni, “She likes eating and wants to be spoiled and admired. But seldom likes sex.”
Women with lemon-shaped breasts: “These women are full of life and can laugh at themselves.”
Pineapples: “Whoever wins their heart will not lose it quickly.”
Grapefruits: “This woman may look erotic but in reality is bashful and homely. She spoils her partner but prefers tenderness over sex.”
Oranges: “While she is self-confident and knows her goals, she has little interest in sex. She likes conversation.”
Cherries: “Make great partners and are moderately interested in sex.”
Pears: “She can be very religious but is known to have affairs.”
In a boob science experiment, Jim compares fruit to Minka’s mega-boobs. Jim holds up an orange to Minka’s tits. Then some melons. No comparison. Only watermelons would work, and he didn’t bring any. Senor Lorenzoni probably never saw Minka’s pictures during his research. He might have abandoned his project. Minka’s beyond cataloging anyway.
Minka’s famous protruding nipples hypnotize Jim. That’s why Minka’s nickname is “Nipple #1.” I can’t think of any fruit that compares to those always-erect pointers.
Minka wants to see his banana. Strictly for research purposes. Turnabout is fair play.
Dave asked young newcomer Milly Marks, “What do you think about porn cock?”
“It’s scary, but it’s hot so it’s cool, and it feels good,” Milly replied.
Some girls are just more girl than other girls. Milly is one of those girls.
“I fuck all of the time if there’s someone around that I want to have sex with, but if not, I’m constantly getting myself off, which is still cool with me. If I’m around someone I want to fuck, then I’ll fuck them at least three times a day. It’s hard for a lot of normal people to keep up with my kind of crazy sex drive.”
Now about today’s big SCORELAND show.
The odds of driving along and spotting a stranded hitcher with Milly Marks’ face, body, boobs and sex appeal are astronomical. I’m sorry to tell you this, but it just doesn’t happen. As a fantasy, it’s pretty freakin’ awesome.
Brad is about to find out how much girl Milly is. He feels compelled to help this angel in distress, and part of that roadside assistance is to take her back to his place so she can “recharge her cell phone battery.” Those lousy batteries can be better than having a great wingman.
Anatomy award winner Roxi Red is a woman of many talents and skills, as seen at SCORELAND since her debut. It’s always been one-on-one for Roxi…until now!
Those two fuckin’ guys Tony and Jimmy have moved into a house. It’s perfectly clean, but Jimmy calls The Greatest Maid Service In The World because he feels the house needs a woman’s touch.
The real reason is that he needs a woman’s touch on his junk. Tony doesn’t see the need for a cleaner until they see Roxi walk to their front door. Then they go into shock.
Whoever said that more than a mouthful is a waste never saw Roxi. The guys will need to call another maid to clean off the mess she inspires them to make. Roxi is more powerful than Viagra.
Posted by Dave on Mar 8, 2017 in Awards, Contest, Digital Magazines, eBoobStore.com, New DVD Releases, newcomers, Other SCORE Group websites, print magazines
The digital version (with five bonus videos) of the May 2017 issue of Voluptuous is available today at eBoobStore.com, and now it can be known: the winners of 2016 V-mag Newcomer of the Year and Model of the Year.
NEWCOMER OF THE YEAR
Second runner-up: Paige Turner
First runner-up: Tiggle Bitties
And the winner is…Rachel Raxxx!
MODEL OF THE YEAR
Second runner-up: Juliana Simms
First runner-up: Alexya
And the winner is…for the second year in a row, Vanessa Y.!
The May 2017 issue has new pictorials of all the winners and runners-up plus the debuts of Codi Vore and Stefania, Natasha Sweet’s first magazine hardcore and a preview of the movie Voluptuous Xtra 18.
For those of you who prefer the traditional paper version of your magazines, the May 2017 V-mag will be available next Tuesday at eBoobStore.com (although I suspect many mag dealers have it right now; that sort of thing has been known to happen).
Posted by Elliot James on Mar 3, 2017 in New at Scoreland
“I’m a really big fan of JMac’s and I watch a lot of his videos at home,” Dulcinea told me. “So it was kind of awesome to get to fuck someone that you watch a lot. I was all nervous around him!”
It’s play dirty time when JMac shows up to give bodacious Dulcinea a no-holds-barred pounder of a pounding.
“I love when a guy gets so into fucking me that he loses himself. I call it ‘the look’ and it’s like he glazes over and becomes an animal.”
A swinger, Dulcinea (Aeryn Elise) enjoys the adult scene and the sex so much she’s devoting herself to it. “I used to be so self-conscious of my body and my own sexuality. After coming here and being treated like a queen– getting my hair and makeup done, being styled, and getting to fuck insanely hot guys! –there was no way I could go back to being quiet, bashful, little ol’ me! I’m much more confident approaching people now, because I see myself as sexy.”
Posted by Dave on Mar 1, 2017 in Behind the Scenes, Boob Watch, New at XL Girls, Other SCORE Group websites
Cat Bangles, rounder, softer and plusher, returns to XLGirls.com today for a solo scene. I never asked Cat this question, but I betcha if she could have any one wish granted, it would be to have longer fingers. The better to finger her tight, wet, pink Latina cunt even deeper than she already does. I’ve never seen a girl as eager to get her fingers as deep into her fuck holes as Cat is. Cat loves it hard and deep, and she gives it to herself hard and deep in this scene.
Cat has big, fat, natural tits with dark areolae. She has curves that go on forever. She has plenty of cushion for the push-in. She has a huge clit and a big ass. She loves to show off every inch of her goodness. She’s of Puerto Rican heritage and lives in New England. Last I heard, she was working in a donut shop. Can you imagine the traffic of horny policemen that donut shop must attract? Talk about Dunkin’ Donuts! How many customers must’ve wanted to dunk their junk into Cat’s trunk.
It absolutely boggles the mind that Cat never did a XXX threesome with two guys until this past December. All we had to do was ask. Cat is too polite to say no.
Said Cat, “I usually play with myself before I go on a date so I can focus on him and not think about sex the whole time unless I’m too horny. Then we could have sex in the middle of our date and then finish our date after that!”
I don’t think she plays hard to get.
I have the perfect way for you to start your weekend.
Watch Elle Flynn suck cock and fuck at SCORELAND.
Elle hasn’t fucked on-camera for anyone but us (and this is her first XXX scene in nearly three years). She has done a lot of fucking in her life. In fact, she fucks for fun and money at The Love Ranch in Crystal, Nevada.
My favorite part of this scene is when Elle jacks her guy to completion onto her big naturals. As the guy spurts and Elle’s tits get covered with cum, she looks up at him with a big smile on her face. Elle is very proud of herself.
This from a girl who had never thought she could be a model before she came to SCORELAND.
Saturday: Spa day with Maya Milano.
Sunday: Dulcinea at a nude beach and more.
Enjoy your weekend!
Posted by Dave on Feb 22, 2017 in Cummin Soon, Hardcore XXX, New at Scoreland, The Life of an Editor
Today at SCORELAND, Danni Lynne has her first three-way. I’m very excited about this. Danni is one of my favorites. Tony and Jimmy, who got the honors of doing Danni, were very excited about this, too.
The scene has added interest for me because of the setup: Danni needs a new mattress moved into her bedroom, so she calls her neighbors to help. It’s very important for a woman like Danni, who fucks a lot, to have a good mattress. These days, I’ve been experimenting with new mattresses, and the experience has not been enjoyable. It would be a lot more enjoyable if I could test mattresses with Danni.
Fact: Firm mattresses are better for fucking. They support you better so you don’t fall into the bed. If you want to fuck deep, a firm mattress is the way to go.
The guys cum all over Danni’s face and huge naturals. The photo set has some great cum shots. She really gets doused.
Thursday at SCORELAND: Katie Thornton returns.
Posted by Dave on Feb 19, 2017 in Behind the Scenes, Deep Inside Scoreland, Hardcore XXX, Other SCORE Group websites, The Life of an Editor, XLGirls
It’s funny sometimes how things work out. For example, back in the day, before I became editor of SCORE, I was a Voluptuous reader first, a SCORE reader second. But when I became an editor at The SCORE Group, I was assigned to SCORE and only a little while later did I become V-mag‘s editor. All in all, I’ve been editing SCORE a lot longer than I’ve been editing V-mag.
As for magazines vs. the Internet, I was an early adopter of web porn. In fact, I was the first official SCORELAND subscriber. But when I got hired by The SCORE Group, it was as a magazine editor. So go figure.
Did I ever tell you the story of how I got hired by TSG? Back in 2001, I was frequenting a local strip joint near Fort Lauderdale, Florida. It was one of those neighborhoody strip mall clubs that was topless only and had very friendly girls. Well, I was big on the day shift (better girls, smaller crowds), and one of the dancers had big, natural tits, so big that I thought she’d be perfect for Voluptuous. So, I did something I’d never done before: I wrote an email to an editor. SCORELAND‘s editor, who was and still is Elliot James. Elliot was so impressed by my detailed, descriptive email that a few months later, when I emailed him again to ask if TSG was hiring, he suggested that I apply for the job as SCORE‘s editor. So I did, and here I am.
As for the dancer, it turned out she had already posed for a Naughty Neighbors “House Party” feature. She was friends with Honey Melons, but this girl, Rachel, wasn’t busty enough for our big-boob mags. Nonetheless, Rachel probably changed my life. I wonder where she is now?
Interesting side story about Rachel: Her father would come to the club where she danced, and he often tipped her. I never could figure that out. For some perverted reason, I loved getting lapdances from her when her father was in the other room. I’d suck her tits, and her father would be in the other room!
Why am I telling this story now? Because for some reason, I was looking at Aspen’s scenes on XLGirls.com and SCORELAND, and I was thinking about how unlikely it was that this girl-next-door, an office worker from the Pacific Northwest, who had no aspirations to become a porn star would be so good at sucking and fucking porn cock in the few scenes she did for us (and only for us). I was wondering where she is now and how likely or unlikely it would be for her to return.
So, I was thinking about likely and unlikely things, and this blog posting happened.