Categories for Confessions

Cleavage: A magnetic valley for your eyes.

November 15, 2009 by Maria
As far as I am concerned, when a chick is showing cleavage she WANTS you to look at it. Big time.

As far as I am concerned, when a chick is showing cleavage she WANTS you to look at it. Big time.

I love being able to come to the blog and talk tits with you fine folks. It’s practically therapeutic to be able to have a forum to get things off my chest about, well, big chests! lol That’s why when  something happened to me a couple of days ago,  I found it worthy of mentioning here.

Okay, so let me set up the situation for you.

You have me, a big-boobed chick, out to lunch with a buddy of mine on Friday. Friday lunches are usually a crowded affair at most of the restaurants surrounding The SCORE Group headquarters here in Miami because most people go out to eat in droves (Maybe because it’s so close to the weekend?). So, my buddy Mario (Hi Mario!) and I are waiting to be seated at a local Colombian restaurant to have some soup since it is currently a bit chilly in Miami. (Yes, my name is Maria and I hang out with a guy named Mario. And yes, chilly to us is 71 degrees. lol)

While we are waiting by the door of this crowded soup place, I notice this chick who is sitting at a table directly ahead of us. She is immersed in a deep convo with her lunch date and doesn’t even glance in our direction. Normally I would have glanced at her and kept going but here is where it gets sticky.

First of all, this chick had MONDO tits. Like HUMONGOUS ones. Second of all, she was wearing this low-cut sweater thing that showed off what I like to refer to as A VALLEY OF TIT CREASE. I’m talking about a fucking Grand Canyon of cleave, dude.

Now when I see cleavage like that, and like that I mean cleavage so deep I want to put my hands into it for warmth, I cannot help but stare. It’s like a fucking magnet for my eyes! I can’t stop looking. I mean, I am stuck in ogle-mode. Seriously.

So I look over at Mario to say, “Hey dude, look at that cleave crack at 12 o’clock,” and I realize that he is also fixated on the funbags ahead. (This is probably why we are friends. We both love big boobs. lol) So, now both Mario and I are staring, no scratch that, we are engraving into our memories each inch of this oblivious babe’s biggums when she looks up and catches us staring at her bosoms.

Now Mario, because he is a guy and is programmed to look away at such moments, plays dumb and acts like he is looking at the wall four feet above her head. But not me. I don’t have that AVOID THE RACK-FRONTATION radar, apparently, and I just keep looking at her tits. So she coughs. Loudly. Irritatedly. But being the oblivious caught-in-her-headlights boob fiend that I am, I don’t notice. I just keep on keepin’ on and I even might have mouthed the word, WOW, while doing so.

That’s when two things happened.

1) Mario elbowed me and whispered, “Stop staring, stupid.”

2) She grabbed her napkin and covered her tits up and sort of snapped me out of my boobnotized state. (That’s when you are hypnotized by the titties, just FYI.)

Shortly after that awkward moment passed, our host sat us and when we walked by she distinctly whispered the words, “Fucking perverts.” Well, whispered is the wrong word. HISSED is more like it.

Now, here is what I have come to vent about on the blog, because, well, I can! lol

WHY AM I THE FUCKING PERVERT WHEN SHE WAS THE ONE WEARING HER CHESTICLES OUT AND ABOUT?!? IT’S NOT MY FAULT SHE WAS FLYING THE TIT FLAG OUT THERE ALL PROUD AND I HAD TO SALUTE IT WITH MY EYEBALLS, IS IT?

I mean, seriously…I have big boobs and when I wear them out like that, like a fucking Macy’s window display, I expect people to stop and stare. Fuck, I expect them to point and maybe even applaud. lol

What I am saying is, what the fuck did she think all that tit crease was gonna do? Repel my peepers?

Has this happened to you guys before? If so, I think we need to start some sort of petition to have a law passed or something because as far as I am concerned, if you’re showin’ off your pair, prepare for the stares.

That’s my rule and I’m stickin’ to it.

Thoughts?

your fucking perverted friend,

Maria

😛

Pssst…check out the rack on this chick!

November 11, 2009 by Maria

And so it is that I return triumphantly to all of you, my boob brothers and sisters, with a pair of undulating orbs so fine that they will surely leave you speechless and sporting wood and engorged clits.

(I love the words WOOD and ENGORGED.)

Meet Jenna Valentine, a 5’3″, 23-year-old Valley Girl from California with FF-cup knockers so pale and pretty, you will love them instantly. Jenna is not only a personable and cute young lady, but she is also funny. Watch as she tells the tale of being attacked by a bidet in one of our bathrooms. It brings the LOLs, big time!

(And get a eyeful of her nipples, which seem a little inverted but are really just “shy,” according to Jenna.)

Jenna will be making a few more blog appearances, but for now, enjoy her bubbly personality and her retro look. If you love pale perkies, Jenna is your gal.

xoxo

Maria

Man’s achievements: What goes around cums around

November 7, 2009 by Elliot James
Secrets of sexcess.

Secrets of sexcess.

At age 4…success is…not peeing in your pants.
At age 12…success is…having friends.
At age 16…success is…having a driver’s license.
At age 20…success is…having sex.
At age 35…success is…having money.
At age 50…success is…having money.
At age 60…success is…having sex.
At age 70…success is…having a driver’s license.
At age 75…success is…having friends.
At age 80…success is…not peeing in your pants.

“Hi! Can I grab your tits?”

October 27, 2009 by Maria

Last week we had a very interesting poll up on the blog.

The question we asked you was, “Have you ever walked up to a woman you didn’t know (other than a hooker or stripper) and asked to feel her tits?”

Out of the 234 of you that answered, the results are as follows:

  • * Yes, and she let me! = 12%
  • * Yes, and she told me to get lost. = 5%
  • * Yes, and she hit me. = 2%
  • * Of course not. Do you think I’m crazy? = 75%
  • * I didn’t ask. I just did it. = 6%

Naturally, most of you went with the, “Do you think I am crazy?” answer. Sure. Why not? It’s safe and polite and a perfectly acceptable answer. So that is all I have to say about that result.

And now I want to talk to the 12 percent of you who said, “Yes, and she let me!”

Cindy Cupps gets the "cup and lift" from a lucky guy.

Cindy Cupps gets the "cup and lift" from a lucky guy.

First of all, kudos to you ballsy guys out there. As a chick with big boobs, people ask me all the time if they are real and then, if they can cop a feel. I never get offended. I don’t always say yes, either. But I understand the lure of big boobs and the curiosity that they create to the average person. Most of the time, I think people ask to cop a feel just to see if they are real or what tits that big feel like. I am guilty of it, too. In fact, you can see in one of my videos with Renee Ross, whose breasts are WAY BIGGER than mine, that I ask if I can grab them. How could I not? They are fucking huge and glorious!  (And she let me, too. THANK YOU, RENEE!)

I think that when you have big hooters, you kind of expect the, “Can I touch them?” moment. And like I said, I don’t always say yes, but on some occasions, I allow it. I mean, I am not talking about erotic nipple-rubbing and grabbing. I am talking about a simple cup and lift. That’s all it takes to put a smile on some lady or man’s face and I don’t think it’s dirty or raunchy. (And yes, I said lady’s face. You would be surprised how many women ask to feel me up. In fact, I am going to say that more often than not, it’s women, not men, who want to get their hands on my hoots.) But it takes a certain finesse to get me to say yes. First of all, you can’t be a drunk, sloppy mess when you ask. I am not your drunken blow-up doll fantasy. Second of all, you can’t just come up and ask that. You should build into that kind of thing with some conversation and get-to-know-you chatting. And lastly, don’t ask with your hands up and in cupping-position already. That’s presumptuous and rude. But hey, that’s just me. A lot of women I know with big boobs will offer a cup and lift to someone first, without being asked. “Do you want to touch them?” or, “Would you like to see them?” are questions that I have heard from a busty beauty or two in my lifetime.

What I want to know is, if you are one of these 12 percent of readers who answered, “Yes, and she let me!” what is your technique for getting the grope? How do you go about it? I would like to hear your stories. And I think that it is necessary that the 75 percent of our blog readers who answered, “Of course not! Do you think I’m crazy?” get as many pointers as possible. lol

Chime in, chest-grabbers! I want to hear your tit tales!

xoxo,

Maria

Legendary Lady…SaRenna Lee

October 25, 2009 by Maria
Sarenna is everything that was right with the big-boobed 90's.

Sarenna is everything that was right with the big-boobed 90's.

When I first took to the blog to talk to talk tits to all of you boob men out there, I told all of you about my first days here at SCORELAND and then I professed my love for the legendary Tawny Peaks. Well, I am back to talk to you about another legend who really floats my boat. A woman who is so drop-dead gorgeous that she would make my balls ache…if I had any. lol

My favorite SaRenna girl-girl shoot was with the always sexy Danni Ashe.

My favorite SaRenna girl-girl shoot was with the always sexy Danni Ashe.

SaRenna is built for speed, not comfort!

SaRenna is built for speed, not comfort!

The subject of this blog is going to be none other than SaRenna Lee, who in my opinion, is one of the top five greats of all time. With her blonde bombshell looks and her prominent and huge boobs, who wouldn’t be in love with Ms. Lee?

I could spend hours upon hours checking out her pics in SCORELAND, they are that good. Some of my faves include her girl-girl with the amazing Danni she and of course, her layout where she dressed up like Marilyn Monroe. (And even though I love Marilyn, she just didn’t have SaRenna’s tit power, ya know what I mean?)

Something about this photo makes me proud to be an American.

Something about this photo makes me proud to be an American.

My only regret is that I never went on a Boob Cruise with SaRenna. I am sure that we would have been breast friends! Alas, I can still gaze lovingly at her photos and revel in the splendor of her perfect slim-and-stacked body.

And although she never went on to do any hardcore, I actually don’t mind. SaRenna is one of those dynamite sex kittens who didn’t have to do hardcore for me to be into her. (Kerry Marie and Janet Jade fall

SaRenna wasn't just tits, either. Her legs and ass were sweet perfection, too!

SaRenna wasn't just tits, either. Her legs and ass were sweet perfection, too!

into this category.) SaRenna was that perfect. I was satisfied to just be allowed to gaze upon her glorious tits. She is, to me, the ultimate Barbie and I only wish that one day, in some faraway place, I will bump into SaRenna and she and I can sit down and chat. (Of course, I will be staring at her tits, but hey, I am only human. lol)

For now, enjoy these shots of the great SaRenna Lee. Ladies this perfect only come around once in a lifetime.

xoxo,

Maria

Boobs…Spill Magnets

October 17, 2009 by Maria

I think that every big-boobed woman in the world will agree with me when I say that sometimes having big boobs can be challenging. For example, buying a bra, or rather, FINDING a bra can turn into something like the quest for the holy grail. And finding a bra that fits AND is cute or sexy is like finding a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Yeah, good luck.

Spill Zone! Oops! Mustard: 1 Vixen: 0

Spill Zone! Oops! Mustard: 1 Vixen: 0

One of the big challenges that big-boobers everywhere face is the strange force that pulls anything that can stain and/or spill to your tits. It never fails. One second you are enjoying a bite of food and the next, you are digging for it down your cleavage. Or one second you are drinking something and the next, a magical hole has opened in your chin and said liquid is now all over your shirt and tits.

It happens. A lot, apparently.

In fact, as I was looking at pictures of hot naked chicks, er, researching this topic, I came across some pics of Vixen LaMoore and lo and behold, like clockwork, while eating a hotdog, mustard attacked her tits. (Now who can blame that mustard, though? Wouldn’t you want to attack Vixen LaMoore’s tits?) It’s like big boobs are magnets that attract everything from men to spills of mustard.

And then of course you have to get a napkin and wet it and rub on  your boobs and your shirt and your boobs through your shirt and before you know it, you are putting on a semi-erotic rub-show for everyone who is watching. (Not that they mind.) Who could look away while a woman is digging in her tits and rubbing them vigorously?

Now, some of you guys out there in blogland have big-breasted wives and girlfriends. Does this

Doesn't the look on Vixen's face scream, "Please lick this off my body!"?

Doesn't the look on Vixen's face scream, "Please lick this off my body!"?

happen to them a lot? Spills on the rack and bits of this and that down the cleavage tunnel? I would love to hear your stories.

xoxox,

Maria

Blow Job 101 With Renee Ross!

October 11, 2009 by Maria

I don’t always start off a blog with blatant cursing, but…

Holy Fucking Shit…

I love Renee Ross.

Renee is probably one of the greatest busties in the universe and that is because not only is she a sweetheart, but she is also saving lives with these instructional videos. (Okay, maybe not saving lives, but damn it, she is doing a public service of some sort. Somewhere out there, someone is going to benefit from these videos BIG TIME.)

A few days ago, Renee gave us a lesson in titty-fucking, and I must say, it was awesome. But it does not compare to the greatness of this BJ How-To. Renee could, and I say this with the utmost respect and awe, teach anyone how to suck the chrome off a bumper. 🙂 If you are reading this blog right now and currently have a girlfriend or a wife or a special lady in your life, bring her to the computer, sit her down and make her watch this video with you. Tell her it’s, like, “couples” stuff to “better your connection.” Chicks eat that shit up. Trust me.

What this really is is an excuse to get a blow job from that lady in your life. A blow job where you and Renee call the shots. Watch the video. Furrow your brow and look like you are concentrating…like you are soaking this up. Like you are watching something on Discovery Channel. Then look over and say something to your gal pal like,”I think that if you did something like that to my penis, it would really enhance fellatio for me.” (Use the words penis and fellatio! It sounds like you are thinking with and communicating from the head above your shoulders. If you use the words cock and blow job, well, then it just sounds like you wanna fuck your lady friend’s face, and chances are she will not be into it. 🙂 )

I promise that if you watch this with a woman and you have her apply some of Renee’s meat-to-mouth techniques, you will get a better blow job than you have had in a long time. Renee’s blow-job mojo is that strong. She has, like, The Force when it comes to siphoning sperm with her kisser.

Enjoy this video, gentlemen, and may you win in the fight for better BJs!

xoxo

Maria

Nipple clamps…OMG! or WTF?!

October 10, 2009 by Maria
Clamps: Yay or Nay? We don't know about you, but Diane Poppos seemed to like them!

Clamps: Yay or Nay? We don't know about you, but Diane Poppos seemed to like them!

Ah, tits.

Amazing how two fleshy orbs can inspire so many, right?

Their magic knows no bounds, and thank goodness for that because there is nothing that I like to do more than to sit at my desk and ponder over breasts. Sometimes I like to think about the weight of them or how a certain woman’s tits would feel against my head, but today, I got to thinking about nipple clamps, of all things.

Why? Because nipple clamps fall into a strange category for me. They are, like, um, the Area 51/Aliens of tit accessories. (Bear with me. I know you just went,”Area 51/Aliens? WTF?” but I am typing in stream of consciousness and I promise it will make sense soon. lol) Nipple clamps are an enigma to me. I have never used them myself, but I have heard of their existence. I have never seen them, but I know they are out there and that people believe in them.

Frankly, I don’t know squat about these little clip-on thingies for your nipples…which is why I took it upon myself to ask around.

I asked, “Nipple clamps…are they, like, thumbs up, ‘Oh, my GOD!’ or are they, like, no, ‘What The Fuck?’ for you?”

Corina Curves feels the suction and pinch and hey, it looks pretty damn good.

Corina Curves feels the suction and pinch and hey, it looks pretty damn good.

And you know what? I got a pretty good rundown from the chicks in the office, which I will share with you.

The first girl I asked is Michelle, our web project coordinator. (Hi Micheelllll!! 🙂 ) She said she had never used them and that she didn’t know squat about them, either. (It made me feel less inexperienced, so ty!)

Then I asked Dani, one of our webmasters, and lo and behold, she had used them before! And here is what she had to say:

“I’ve used them before, I think because a guy I was with wanted me to. They just felt like someone pinching/pulling your nipples, but, like, more constant. I dunno, I think I just did it to try it. It’s, like, another form of nipple play. They’re okay. But I have them pierced now, so I much prefer that.”

And there you have it. That, believe it or not, was enough of a testimony that I feel like I could possibly use them in the future…maybe. lol (Thank you, Dani, for your wisdom. 😉 )

Now what I want to know is have any of you guys used clamps on a girl before? Or…on yourselves? (Rawr…kinky!) Let me know. I would love to hear your stories.

xoxo,

Maria

Girls holding magazines…kinky, eh?

October 9, 2009 by Elliot James
Cynthia Romero and November 2005 SCORE

Cynthia Romero and November 2005 SCORE

Jade Feng with December 2007 SCORE

Jade Feng with December 2007 SCORE

I have this oddball kind of…I don’t know what to call it…interest? Pasttime? Hobby? Fetish? Quirk?

No, it’s not paying a busty dominatrix to stomp me.

I like to see photos of the girls holding up the magazines they’re in. Kinky, eh?

Whenever a regular model is back in the building, I alway ask the studio to get a shot of her holding up a magazine she’s been in. I don’t know what it is about that simple act that I like so much. I know part of it is knowing we made that magazine they’re holding in their hands. Pride of creation, I think. It doesn’t work with the websites. There’s really no such concept as a cover in the Internet world. A photo of a model sitting by a computer monitor or holding up a laptop doesn’t have the magic, at least for me.

Jessica Turner by the PC. Not the same as a magazine.

Jessica Turner by the PC. Not the same as a magazine.

romina Lopez and September 2005 Voluptuous

Romina Lopez and September 2005 Voluptuous

Penny Porsche and February 2005 SCORE

Penny Porsche and February 2005 SCORE

It has to be a physical object we produced…a magazine, a DVD case, a calendar…or it doesn’t work.

I guess that’s the old-skool in me.

Awesome V-mag Girl Devin Taylor

Awesome V-Mag Girl Devin Taylor

Amber Brooks and August 2005 SCORE

Amber Brooks and August 2005 SCORE

I’m back with Renee and MORE FREE STUFF!

September 20, 2009 by Maria

So I haven’t been on the blog in a while and no, it’s not because I have been kidnapped by a tribe of big-boobed women from Mamazon! I’ve actually been takin’ care of big-boob business and getting together all sorts of exciting stuff for you guys. (You can thank me later. And trust me, you WILL be thanking me.) So, let me recap what has been going on here at SCORELAND.

First and foremost, we gave away LOADS of free stuff this week. We gave five lucky winners copies of XL GIRLS SP187 signed by cover girl Samantha 38G! And then we gave away five copies of V-Mag‘s Oct. ’09 issue signed by Renee Ross. We contacted winners via email and we sent your mags out, so keep an eye out for a special delivery!

Now, for those of you who follow the comings and goings on the blog, you know that Renee is very active on here and that she responds to her fans. Well, she wanted to send the winners of her issues a little shout out when she was here this week, and I thought, hey, why not? So check it out as Renee congratulate you guys, personally.

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!

Because I am a fan of FREE STUFF, I decided that we should pick TWO MORE WINNERS for the Renee Ross mag giveaway and have her sign two extra mags for you guys. So check it out as she announces the two extra winners and signs their mags in this video. (She’s a generous gal, that Renee!)

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!

Okay, we get it…I secretly get off on giving you guys freebies! (It makes me feel sooooo good! lol) So, I started thinking about how Renee’s new movie, Sex In The Titties JUST came out, I thought to myself, wouldn’t it be AWESOME if I had Renee sign a copy of this DVD to give away on the blog?

BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!

Then I thought to myself, wait, what if I had her sign that AND her first solo movie, Tits, Tits, Tits and we gave that away on the blog, too?

So, that’s what I am doing! I am going to give you guys a chance to win one of these two DVDs, signed by Ms. Ross!

If you would like to enter to win one of these two signed DVDs, please send your FULL NAME, MAILING ADDRESS and D.O.B. to blog@scoreland.com with the words RENEE ROSS DVD GIVEAWAY in the subject line. ONLY ONE ENTRY PER EMAIL, PLEASE!

I will be choosing two winners at random and will send you your autographed DVDs lickety-split. The deadline for all entries is October 3, 2009. I’ll contact winners via email. Good luck and I hope you guys are digging all these giveaways…I am not sure if I am going to get in trouble for throwing so many freebies your way, but what can I say? I love to.

Good to be back on the blog grind! Check out Renee’s video below.

xoxo

Maria