Categories for The Life of an Editor

The Motorboat: Why I am an old sailor…

August 20, 2009 by Maria 10 Comments
Motorboating: Fun for everyone involved!

Motorboating: Fun for everyone involved!

Titties, titties, titties…you gotta fuckin’ love them!
I know I do. I mean, they bounce, they jiggle, they’re squishy and full and sucking on them is sorta nutritious. You can slap ’em around and pinch ’em and they are great things to sandwich your hands or your cock between.

But you want to know what my favorite thing about big tits is?

MOTORBOATING THEM.

If you just stopped reading this and asked, “What’s that mean?” then you need to hang your head in shame and turn in your big-tit lover’s card. It’s been revoked!

Okay, not really, but that just means I will have to take this time to explain what motorboating is.

Unlike Elliot, the boob Jedi here at SCORE, I am not going to go into a very detailed explanation of the history of the term motorboat here. (Sorry Elliot, not knocking your research! lol) I’ll just explain where I first heard the term and then what it is.

There is a wonderful, little flick called Wedding Crashers and in it there is a scene where Owen Wilson’s character has just been come on to by smoking-hot cougar, Jane Seymour. Afterward, he meets up with his best bud, played by the always-funny Vince Vaughn and explains that this MILF just forced him to grope her breasts, Vince Vaughn says:

Hey, what were they like anyway? They looked pretty good, are they real? Are they built for speed or comfort? What’d you do with them? Motorboat? You play the motorboat?
[makes sputtering motorboat noise] You motorboatin’ son of a bitch! You old sailor you!”

Basically, what it means to motorboat a hot set of tits is when you wedge your face between them and either squeeze the tits firmly about your mug or have the woman, whom said tits belong to, squeeze them for you. Then you proceed to make a sputtering motor noise with your mouth and shake your head back and forth in her cleavage.

Infantile? Maybe. But I can’t tell you how much joy this brings me every time I do it to a big set of hooters. I can’t tell you how many strippers I’ve done this to, either.

But the funny thing is how many NORMAL, EVERY-DAY, AVERAGE WOMEN have let me do this to their tits, too. Or how many men and women have asked to do it to me. (In fact, I once hosted a charity booth for breast cancer where I let strangers motorboat me for $1 for a couple of hours. About $500 later, I came to terms with the power of the motorboat! lol) Maybe it’s because it was brought into the mainstream by Wedding Crashers, but you would be surprised how many people motorboat tits and how many big-titted women are okay with it. And seriously, in a world full of dirty, nasty sexual things that you CAN’T do in public, motorboating is just good, clean fun. lol

Luckily, I managed to get a shot of Renee Ross motorboating once of our studio lads to illustrate the proper way this should be done.

My advice, go out to your local bar or pool hall and find yourself a big-breasted babe. Buy her a drink and then, after you’ve exchanged the preliminaries and she is convinced you’re a great guy, ask her if you can motorboat her boobs. Now, it may not work all the time (Men have asked me and sometimes I have said no…but there are plenty of times I’ve said yes.), but chances are, she might say yes and you will get to mash your face into her sweet valley of tit-flesh.

And once you do, I suggest you hang on and ride the tide, you old sailors, you!

lol

-Maria

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Rating: 4.4/5

She can talk and fuck at the same time!

August 20, 2009 by Dave 8 Comments

If you’ve ever wondered what a porn editor does all day…

Well, on this day, I walked onto the set where big-titted 50-year-old hottie Persia Monir was fucking and interviewed her while she had a cock in her pussy. The photographer didn’t seem to mind. The Stunt Cock didn’t seem to mind. Persia definitely didn’t seem to mind. I had trouble keeping the camera steady, but I mostly managed, I think. I’d never done this before.

Just minutes after I left, Persia took a cock in her ass on camera for the first time. You can see that–the professionally shot and edited version, of course–today at 50PlusMILFs.com.

You know, this beats interviewing sweaty, surly baseball players. Or working.

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Rating: 4.7/5

A different definition of “hard at work”

August 19, 2009 by Elliot James 2 Comments

The following blog post is by Allie, the editor of 18eighteen and XLGirls magazines.

Not to downplay my love of big titties, but I’m going to take this post in a different direction from most of the other entries on this blog.

I don’t know if anyone out there gives a damn, but this is my post and I want to talk about working in porn for a minute. I mean, it’s different.

When I first meet someone and we get to the “So what do you do?” conversation, I have to decide whether to tell them that I work in “publishing” or porn. Usually if they seem like a conservative tight ass, I say publishing and change the subject. If I sense that my new acquaintance is your average down-to-earth, dirty-minded pervert (like myself), I tell ‘em the truth.

That being said, my parents know what I do for a living, but my extended family doesn’t. Extended family, if your Google skills lead you here…um, sorry.

Obviously, there are things about this job that make it unique from others. But it’s like a normal job in many other aspects as well.

What’s different:

First of all, the language. We talk quite openly (and loudly) about pussy, cock and tits. We also speak this way in important meetings. It’s part of our business lingo. Imagine telling your boss, “We need a better shot of a cock in her pussy.” Happens all the time.

I remember one specific incident where I had this conversation with SCORE editor Dave:
Me: Is there a hyphen in ass fucking?
Dave: That depends. Is it modifying a noun, like ass-fucking sluts?
Me: Nope. Just ass fucking.
Dave: No hyphen then.

Often us SCORE editors will congregate to ponder profound questions, like which would you rather fuck, an ugly chick with huge knockers or a pretty, flat girl? Or which is worse, a flat ass or cankles? But SCORE Men probably have similar conversations at their jobs too. Right, guys?

Editors are a busy bunch. There's no time for foolishness.

Editors are a busy bunch. There's no time for foolishness.

Then there are the models. Most of us only see them when their photo sets come through the pipeline, but sometimes we get to see them up close and personal. It’s something else to be called into the studio and have a model do a 360 for you completely nude. And it can be a bit awkward during the interviews when we ask them about sucking cock and fucking. But they’re usually happy to divulge the horny details of their sex lives.

Some other things that stand out about working here: Being extras in our feature movies like My Big Plump Wedding. Coming up with adjectives for pussy, cock, sex and boobs. And finally, being able to watch porn whenever I want while in the office.

What’s not so different:

It’s funny that a lot of people have this notion that going to work in an adult publishing company is like going to a strip club. I know it’s porn and stuff, but we have, like, responsibilities. The truth is that I get here, I drink my coffee and I work in a cubicle. I work normal hours and I have deadlines to meet.

The office rest room gets crowded at times.

The office rest room gets crowded at times.

Everyone wears normal clothes. Sometimes we even wear jackets because it can get a bit nippy indoors. We have meetings and other business matters to attend to. Not so crazy, but in the end, it’s for you guys reading this right now.

To be honest, I didn’t know what to expect when I started working here. But it’s been great so far. I love being able to come to work and say cock and look at naked people. But, maybe I’m just weird.

And fellow editors, if I missed anything, feel free to chime in!-Allie

 

You are looking at Score staff with the exception of bridesmaid Maria Moore.

You are looking at the Score staff with the exception of bridesmaid Maria Moore.

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Rating: 3.7/5

Where did boobs come from?

August 17, 2009 by Elliot James 2 Comments
Tits, Hooters, Knockers, Cans, Jugs....

Tits, Hooters, Knockers, Cans, Jugs....Whatever you call ’em, Merilyn Sakova has ’em!

We use the words tits, boobs and jugs every day (like a lawyer uses the words bill, golf and lunch). But how did those words originate? According to scholars who study the origin of words, “boobs” dates back to the late 17th-century word “boobies” or “booby,” which is baby talk for breasts and an offshoot of “bubby.” “Tits,” traced back to 1928, is from teat. But “titty” is on record from 1746 as nursery talk for teat. “Bazooms” is a fairly recent word (from the U.S. in 1955) and is a spinoff of the word bosoms.

“Jugs” goes back to 1538 from the word “jugge” and is said to be from “jug,” a word for a 16th-century maidservant (a servant who would carry a jug of water to fill a wash bowl as in, “Hey, Miss Jug, bring the water over here!”). The first use of the word “jugs” as slang for a woman’s breasts was first recorded in 1920 in Australia and is short for the slang term milk-jugs.

Knockers, a word that peaked in popularity in the 1950s, is thought to have originated in 1941. It could be British in origin and some researchers base its origin on the “knocker,” a breast-pin worn by ladies that was shaped like a door knocker.

You learn something new about tits every day at SCORELAND. And that’s just in English. There are words for breasts in every language. And I have a word for that: Boobonics.

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Rating: 4.4/5

Big tits: A place to hold all your stuff.

August 14, 2009 by Maria 3 Comments
How many things do you think that you could stuff into Ashley's cleavage, eh?

How many things do you think you could stuff into Ashley's cleavage, eh?

Today I went to the boxing gym (Yes, I box. Not that Taebo bullshit, either. Real boxing.) and I met up with one of my sparring partners, Christina. She and I are great sparring partners because we both have big boobs. It’s kind of hard to box with big tits (they kinda get in the way), and I have to compensate when I block and throw punches and so does she, so it’s like we’re made for one another in the ring.

Well, when I met Christina at the gym today, she was already in her workout gear (sports bra, shorts and sneakers) and I asked to borrow her spare gloves. She told me they were in her car and then proceeded to put her entire hand into her bra and fish around in there until she pulled it out and produced her car keys. I am not talking about one key, either. I am talking about a key ring with about five keys on it. Then she said, “Can you do me a favor and put my phone in my car when you go?” and she reached back into her tits and pulled out her cell, too. Yeah…she had all that stuff tucked away in her tatas.

(I can’t lie…I tuck lots of stuff away in my cleavage, too.)

I just find it funny that chicks with big tits are like kangaroos, always tucking stuff away in their sweater-puppy pouches. I asked a few guys around the office if they’d ever seen a chick fishing around in her tits for something and they all said yes. In fact, one guy even said, “My ex-girlfriend once snuck an entire bottle of whiskey AND a camera into a concert in her tits.” Wow! I don’t care who you are, you all have to admit THAT is impressive.

I love the idea of the tit pocket so much that I once had Christy Marks head to South Beach, stuff her bra full of random items and stop strangers and ask them, “Guess what’s in my tits?” (Tits and games: The best entertainment.) lol

So, I guess what I am getting at is that tits are not only great headrests, cock holders, things to suck on and something to hold on to on the coldest of nights but also a great place to hold all of your stuff, too.

Three cheers for tits! Their diversity is excellent!

-Maria

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Rating: 4.9/5

“My, madam, what lovely tits you have!”

August 13, 2009 by Dave Leave your thoughts

In today’s clip, Brandy Talore shows what happens when you fail to show her respect. Yes, you can watch Brandy’s pretty face getting painted with cum and jack while her nice, shaved hole is being drilled hard, but you can’t walk up to her in public and say, “Hey, Brandy, nice rack.” Something doesn’t seem right about this. I mean, if you saw Tiger Woods out in public, you could walk up to him and say, “Tiger, I really admire your swing.” But you can’t go up to Brandy and say, “Nice rack”? Go figure.

Anyway, I’m just wondering: Would you ever walk up to a woman you didn’t know and say to her, “Nice tits” or “Nice rack”? If you have, how did she react? And if you haven’t, how would you expect her to react?

This reminds me of the time I was walking down the Strip in Las Vegas and saw a guy (he was probably 20 or so) grab a girl’s ass as he passed her. He kept walking, she looked over her shoulder, and that was it! I couldn’t believe it. If I did something like that, I’d expect the ass-grabbing police to be on me in a flash. But I wouldn’t do that. Would you?

If a girl walked up to me in public and said, “Nice cock,” I’d probably propose to her on the spot.

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Rating: 4.0/5

Where have all the big-boobed strippers gone?

August 11, 2009 by Elliot James 4 Comments

According to the British newspaper The Guardian, more money is spent in strip clubs in the U.S. than on theater, opera, ballet, jazz and classical music concerts combined. That interested me because of all the editors, I’m the numbers guy. I even poll the members of SCORELAND, mainly about questions tied to big-boobs. (What else?)

I’ve been going to strip clubs for years, so with that in mind, I recently asked two questions of SCORELANDERS. My first question was: In strip clubs, how often do you get lap dances? Eighteen-percent said always, 42% said they’d get a dance if they saw a girl they really liked, 6% never buy dances and 33% said they don’t go to strip clubs.

Then I asked a question that was more germane to SCORELAND: Do you like photo sets and video with a strip club or lap dance theme? The results: 24% love them, 23% like them, 38% said they were indifferent and the remaining 14% hate them. So maybe strip clubs are just not as popular as they were in the ’90s. Or maybe guys can only handle the environment or the expense for so long before they bail out and need a break.

What I don’t see are any dancers stacked like Summer Sinn at Goldfingers or The Boobie Trap, two local skin emporiums. My friends in other cities tell me the same thing. What happened to all the really busty dancers across the U.S.? They’re not easy to find anymore. That’s one of the main reasons I don’t go like I used to.

Summer’s back next week at SCORELAND. She’s not playing a stripper, but she is sliding down a bologna pole. Her huge boobs are always a welcome sight here.

If you guys ever see a really busty dancer in your strip club travels (those of you who still go, that is), let us know. These gals have become an endangered species.

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Rating: 4.3/5

Areolae and Nipples: A deep discussion about dugs.

August 9, 2009 by Maria 4 Comments

Howdy SCORElanders and tit aficionados.

Today I want to talk about two subjects that are near and dear to my heart: areolae and nipples.

You see, I think that big tits are great but only because every tit out there has its own personality based on what kind of dug it’s sporting. There are all sorts of nips and areolae out there, and I’ve always wondered if anyone else categorizes them like I do. When I see a pair of big tits, I automatically assess the type of dug and file said tits into their own class.So I figured why not share my thoughts on nipples with you guys, eh? I would love to know if you guys have your own categories for areolae and what they are. Let’s discuss!

And now, without further ado, let’s take a quick stroll down Dug Street, gentlemen.

-Maria

Pepperonnis: Otherwise known as "chicas", these areolae are darker in color and usually found on Latina ladies like Paola Rios.

Pepperonnis: Otherwise known as "chicas," these areolae are darker in color and usually found on Latina ladies like Paola Rios.

Mocha Mams/m&m's: Dark and lovely dugs that look like they taste like chocolate. Janet Jade's got a great pair of m&m's.

Mocha Mams/m&m's: Dark and lovely dugs that look like they taste like chocolate. Janet Jade's got a great pair of m&m's.

Pink Perkies: Tiny nipples and tiny, areolae that are usually lighter in color like June Summers'.

Pink Perkies: Tiny nipples and tiny areolae that are usually lighter in color, like June Summers'.

Pierced Pups: Any type of nipple sporting jewelery like Alexis Amore's.

Pierced Pups: Any type of nipple sporting jewelery like Alexis Amore's.

Super-Sizers: When areolae are large and make up more than 40% of the facade of a big tit like Denise Davies' dugs.

Super-Sizers: When areolae are large and make up more than 40% of the facade of a big tit like Denise Davies' dugs.

Faders: When areolae are so faint in color that they kind of dissappear into the rest of the tit flesh like Bea Flora's do.

Faders: When areolae are so faint in color that they kind of dissappear into the rest of the tit flesh like Bea Flora's do.

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Rating: 4.6/5

Girls ogling other girls’ tits

August 9, 2009 by Elliot James Leave your thoughts

I love seeing a girl with big tits checking out another girl’s big tits. The more surreptitiously the looker is looking, the better. I don’t mean in some staged photo or video. I mean in a candid, real moment. Photos like that have to be snapped spontaneously. It just happens.

Gunns gives L'Amour the eye.

Gunns gives L'Amour the eye.

Like this photo (left) of Crystal Gunns giving Vixen L’Amour the eye in the SCORE exhibit at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Vegas a few years ago. Or rather, Crystal giving Vixen’s boobs the quick eye. Vixen’s chest couldn’t be more “in your face.” And Crystal’s quick sneak-peek at Vixen’s peek-a-boo nipples is priceless. There’s nothing sexual going on but there might be, subconsciously.

Plenty UpTopp is a'twitter over Elizabeth Starr.

Plenty UpTopp is a'twitter over Elizabeth Starr.

Another split second and that guy’s head at left would have blocked Vixen and Crystal. I know, because I snapped the shot. At adult conventions, the male visitors get so excited, the entire showfloor becomes a mosh pit. I’ve shot a ton of these convention photos for SCORELAND over the years.

It’s funny, but the simple things are more arousing to me. I love to see girls checking out girls in real life. The beach is a great place to spot girls eyeballing other girls’ bodies.

Just as a contrast, here’s Plenty UpTopp’s expression as she checks out the top shelf of Elizabeth Starr at the Exotic Dancer Expo in August 2001. Nice publicity shot, and both of these sex bombs have huge busts, but that candid reality feel is not there. However, I love how Plenty’s very uplifted cleavage nearly forms a shelf for her chin.

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Rating: 4.4/5

Talkin’ dirty with Kelly Shibari…

August 7, 2009 by Maria 10 Comments

Ha! I said it was only a matter of time before I got to chat with Kelly Shibari, and I was right! I stormed into our studio today and basically stole Kelly from her sit-down interview with our XL Girls editor, Allie Q. (Sorry, Allie!)

Why did I do that?

Well, ever since someone commented that I look like Ms. Shibari, everyone in the office has been calling me Kelly. So I thought it would be fun to talk with her, and yes, I wanted to see her tits in person…and I did! Lester, our video editor, played cameraman while I chatted with Kelly and subsequently almost fell when the wood floor I was standing on split open and swallowed my high heel! lol Kelly was a great sport, teaching me how to talk dirty in Japanese and letting me rest my head on her tits, too. (I fucking LOVE laying my noggin on a pair of big tits. Pillow tits are my place of comfort.)

Check out the video below of my first encounter with my Asian “twin.” LOL!

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Rating: 4.3/5