Categories for Tit Tricks

A Valentine from us to YOU!

February 14, 2010 by Maria 19 Comments

Hello Boob Lovers!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I am sure for most of you this is a day filled with ass-kissery to the lady loves in your lives. You know how it goes…you have to take her out to a fancy dinner. You have to buy her something sparkly. You have to “make love,” which we all know is the pretentious, drawn-out, slightly soap-opera-ish cousin to our fave…”fucking.” Valentine’s Day is tough on dudes. I get it. (Even though I am a chick, believe me, I get it. And besides, I don’t have a Valentine of my own this year, so I am allowed to shit all over this holiday meant to make single gals like me turn to chocolate and our vibrators for comfort. lol)

But I ask you this, boob brethren, WHERE THE FUCK IS YOUR PRESENT? I don’t see chicks bending over backwards for you on this day. Oh, no. And that, my friends, is biased bullshit. Where is the love for the dudes? WHERE IS THE SPECIAL TREATMENT?

So, on this Valentine’s Day, I have decided to give YOU a Valentine.

Jenna Valentine, that is. 🙂

Jenna is one of my boobied, cutied faves because she is funny, has a great rack and she is pretty damn hot. (She also has a shy nipple that doesn’t get hard right away and will make you want to suck on it until it does.) And she is into chicks, which means that in my imagination, I have banged her a few times. (Okay, more than a few times. lol) When Jenna was here last, Dave and I hung out with her and took her measurements because this sexy lady from California (She talks like a Valley girl and whereas most times I would find that annoying, when this pale-skinned hottie does it, it’s a huge turn-on!) claims that she was a double-F because she didn’t fit an F. And you know what? Jenna knows her body because she was right. She’s a FF-cup. And I got to be THIS CLOSE to her as I measured her, and I am NOT complaining, because unlike my blogging cohort, Adam, I know what to do with a big pair of tits. (LOL! Sorry Adam, you asked for it, buddy.)

Plus, I taught her how to make her boobs bounce and that is the gift that keeps on giving.

So enjoy this Valentine from us to you because goddamn it, you’re special and you deserve something nice on this ridiculous chick holiday, too!

xoxoxo

Maria

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SCORELAND: Like Xanadu with tits!

February 12, 2010 by Maria 21 Comments
Dave with Renee. I am sure he is giving her skating tits, er, tips. lol

Dave with Renee. I am sure he is giving her skating tits, er, tips. lol

Something is always going down in the SCORE offices. Sometimes, you walk into the kitchen and there’s a big-titter at your table, eating some lunch, and her cleavage is burning a hole in your retinas. Sometimes you walk into an empty office and there’s a super-titter on the desk, spread eagle and in the middle of a photo shoot. And sometimes you are walking down the hallway and you almost get run over by mega-titter Renee Ross on roller skates. And in booty shorts, too.

Yes…SCORE is sometimes like Xanadu, but with more tits.

Here is what I can tell you about Renee. She is one of THE sweetest ladies you will ever meet. She is very funny and personable. She loves to laugh and it comes across whenever she is on set. And she is pretty great on roller skates. She was so excited to roller skate around our offices and do tricks for everyone watching that we found ourselves watching her roll around for quite some time. And when I say WE, I mean practically everyone in our office. Renee is easy on the eyes but bad for work productivity. lol

The only way this would be better is if Renee was naked! :)

The only way this would be better is if Renee was naked! 🙂

We all secretly hoped Renee fell…on top of one of us so we'd be victims of a tit collision. YUM.

We all secretly hoped Renee fell…on top of one of us so we'd be victims of a tit collision. YUM.

Renee rolls by our video editor/cameraman, Lester. Just another day in the office...

Renee rolls by our video editor/cameraman, Lester. Just another day in the office...

With tits like that, I'd play rollerderby with Renee anyday!

With tits like that, I'd play rollerderby with Renee anyday!

So check out this video of Renee on her skates because it’s Thursday, and on Friday we like to have fun! 🙂

Hope everyone has a smashing weekend and that all of you curl up with a sexy busty, too!

Maria

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Yoga with Kaytee Carter :)

February 4, 2010 by Maria 6 Comments

Exercise is essential. It really is.

That is why whenever I get a chance to see a hot girl work out in tight pants and a tiny top she is spilling out of, I do. (Because I totally agree…exercise is important. lol)

So, when I had a chance to catch up with Kaytee Carter and she told me that she loves to do yoga, I figured why not get her to do some for the blog? And of course, she did it in a tiny sports bra and then, eventually, topless. Now, I am not a yogi, or, um, a yoga master. Hell, I don’t even like yogurt! But I’ll tell you what…watching this chick bend into all sorts of positions and hearing her little satisfied grunts as she stretched her hot bod, well, it got my heart rate going! (And I am sure that it will get your heart rate going, too!)

I have a special place in my heart for the busties who love yoga. Chloe Vevrier is a yoga fanatic and even did some yoga for our lensmen when she was filming On Location Key Largo. And Christy Marks is a yoga lover, too! She can bend herself into an incredible fuck pretzel at the drop of a hat. You have to respect a woman who says, “Hey, look at my tits…and watch me put my legs behind my head.” (Kinda makes you wish all chicks could do that, eh?) Chicks that like yoga should wear shirts that say, “Fuck me, I’m limber!”

So, what did we learn today, guys?

1) Exercise is important.

2) Girls should work out topless.

3) Girls who do yoga are good lays.

Enjoy this exercise video. Well, jackcercise video, anyway. lol

xoxo

Maria

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Boobs: The Profile Shot

December 10, 2009 by Maria 9 Comments
I love to see a woman's tits from the side…thank you, Yurizan!

I love to see a woman's tits from the side…thank you, Yurizan!

I love to blog about tits and why I love them, why they rule and all the good stuff in between.

And part of that involves one of my favorite things of all time…

The profile shot of a great pair of bazoombas.

I don’t know what it is about that titty side-view that makes me happy, but it does.

(Check out Yurizan‘s profile shot from the Holiday ’08 issue of SCORE. Isn’t it glorious? Doesn’t it just bring a smile of pure joy to your face?)

Maybe it’s because deep down inside, in places that I don’t discuss at dinner parties…I am an ass-lover, too.

(And cue collective GASP! from all you die-hard boob lovers out there. LOL I am, after all, not only the the editor of V-mag but the editor of BootyLicious mag, too!)

When a lady stands sideways like that, not only do you get to see the wonderful slope of her tit and the wonderful curve underneath it, but you also get a peek at her backside. And who doesn’t love that? Seeing her ripe rump and her glorious ta-tas takes me to a place in my mind where I imagine her in doggie-style. Maybe someone is spanking her ass and cupping her boobs at the same time. Maybe whispering dirty, sweet nothings into her ear.

Oh, yeah.

And that, my friends, is hot. Period. You can’t compete with the wonderful images that the side boob shot inspires.

(And for the record, Yurizan, in all her amazing and possibly EPIC sexiness, was the PERFECT model for this blog posting. But then again, she is one of my faves, so I am a little biased!) 😛

lol

xoxox

Maria

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The Whipped Cream Debate

December 9, 2009 by Maria 23 Comments
Anninna decorates her dugs wih a can o' the whip.

Annina decorates her dugs wih a can o' the whip.

Today I want to talk about what I like to refer to as The Great Whipped Cream Debate of 2009.

Is Cynthia's whipped cream use acceptable or too messy for your taste?

Is Cynthia's whipped cream use acceptable or too messy for your taste?

(Okay, it’s not that GREAT of a debate, but the title sounds fancy so I went with it.) 😉

You see, round these parts, I find myself enmeshed in these conversations with other editors, art directors and staff, and one of those convos was about the whole food and tits situation.

(Yes, these are ACTUAL debates that happen when your whole day revolves around hooters. Seriously.)

Some people were all for food and jugs making lovely music together.(Like when Annina coated her tits in the Holiday ’08 issue of SCORE.)

And others saw pics of Cynthia Romero‘s foodie boobs from the Jan. ’06 issue of SCORE and raged against it with a fervor usually reserved for our Piercings and Tattoos Debates. (Yes, we have those, too. lol)

“It’s messy and nasty!” said some.

“It’s fucking hot to see a pair of tits covered in sticky, sweet goodness!” said others.

And so the debate raged on and on, and when it was all said and done, it boiled down to one thing and one thing only.

Whipped cream.

You see, whipped cream is that treat that sits right on the fence that separates the foodies from the non-foodies here in our office.

Sam is a whipped cream kinda gal.

Sam is a whipped cream kinda gal.

All of the staffers who were adamantly against food-on-jugs action said that whipped cream was the exception.

It's a party and you, Karina and her can of whipped cream are invited.

It's a party, and you, Karina and her can of whipped cream are invited.

While looking at a set of Karina Hart playing with whipped cream, the anti-foodies said, “It’s acceptable. Not too much of it, but a little whipped cream is okay.”

And when checking out Sam Spring‘s June ’07 V-mag layout, the food-on-dugs lovers said that whipped cream was a staple for tit play.

“It’s a must. It’s perfect. You can precisely cover a pair of nipples with just a few squirts of that can of creamy goodness,” said the pro-foodies.

So, after hearing everyone in the office chime in on their edible/non-edible tata preferences, I decided that the only way to settle this debate was to come to you, the boob-loving masses, and let you guys hash it out and decide.

So what say you, big-tit lovers? Is food on boobflesh A-okay, or is it a titty taboo?

Is whipped cream the universal peacemaker for this debate?

And moreover, after all this talk of food and tits and creamy, yummy stuff, are you as hungry as I am?

lol

Chime in, guys.

xoxo

Maria

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New Tits! Bebe Cooper: WOW! She’s SUPER!

November 4, 2009 by Maria 40 Comments

Hello boob lovers and tit hounds! I’m back, and guess what I’ve got for you?

NEW TITS!

NEW TITS!

NEW TITS!

Whew!

First thing that I want to do is say that I love, no wait, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE when we have busty new girls in the studio. It’s like Christmas. Or maybe it’s like Chestmas. Or Titmas? Either way, it’s fuckin’ awesome.

So, allow me to introduce you to Bebe Cooper, a fiery redhead from Springfield, Missouri. She’s a natural ginger and has the prettiest, creamiest pale H-cups around. She is a comic-book nerd and loves video games, and she loves tattoos and has the sweetest disposition, too. But you know what makes Bebe the best? (Besides her amazing boobies and her pretty face…) Here’s a hint…SHE COULD BE A SPOKESPERSON FOR THOSE “GOT MILK?” ADS.

Okay, I’ll spill the beans…Bebe Cooper rocks my socks and will rock your cocks because she is a MILKER!

That’s right, a MILKER!

(For those of you not in the “know,” a milker is a busty lady who recently had a baby and whose jugs are full o’ the breast milk.)

In fact, I even managed to pilfer some video footage from one of her Web shoots of Bebe drainin’ her dugs for you. (I know, I am a thief, but fuck it! I wanted to put it up for you guys. I will deal with the consequences!)

We don’t always get busty milkers in here, but when we do, you can be sure that I will always steal video footage so you can see it. lol

Enjoy this fiesty redhead and look for more on her soon on the blog.

xoxo,

Maria

PS: You can also get a sneak-peek of another amazing, busty find at the end of this video. A new wondrous lady by the name of Kaytee Carter. Look for more of her on the blog, too!

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Oil makes everything better

October 21, 2009 by Maria 6 Comments
Kerry Marie is spectacular. Kerry Marie covered in oil? Jack-tacular!

Kerry Marie is spectacular. Kerry Marie covered in oil? Jack-tacular!

Terry Nova is ready to wrap her oiled orbs on your cock.

Terry Nova is ready to wrap her oiled orbs on your cock.

Jezhabelle looks like she enjoys a good greasin'!

Jezhabelle looks like she enjoys a good greasin'!

Carmen Hayes is like a little, greasy pretzel from Big-Tit Heaven.

Carmen Hayes is like a little, greasy pretzel from Big-Tit Heaven.

Oh, Annie Swanson, pour some sugar on me!

Oh, Annie Swanson, pour some sugar on me!

Angela White could slide her perkies all over me, anyday.

Angela White could slide her perkies all over me, any day.

Let’s make something very clear: Tits are wonderful, wonderful things.

Now I want to make this statement: OIL MAKES TITS BETTER.

It is absolutely, 100 percent true. You can be staring at the most-marvelous boobies in the whole entire universe and they are good, but, add some oil all over those orbs and WHAMMO! they get much better. It’s something about the greasiness that just elevates them to the next level. It’s the shiny, slick wonder of them that makes you want to run your hands over their lubricated surface.

And now that we are on the subject, how great do oily tits feel, eh? Marvelous! I could rub on a pair of slippery tits all day. Oil is, like, synonymous with horny, good times. I would love to high-five every model who ever greased up for boob play. I mean, think about it. Think about a room full of naked chicks…pretty hot, right? Now imagine them covered in oil and just slippin’ and slidin’ all over the place.

(Seriously, this is the reason why the our dick-flick, B.L.O.W., Busty Ladies of Oil Wrestling, starring Cherry Brady, Angela White, Brandy Talore and Annie Swanson is one of my all-time faves. It’s greasy goodness and rough play, and there are four busty ladies wrestling. How can that combo NOT rock your jock? You can get a copy at the eBoobstore, and you SHOULD get a copy. )

For now, please peruse some of my oily favorites in all of their slick lustrous bustiness.

Enjoy!

xoxo

Maria

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Carrie Ashton will burst your bubble!

October 12, 2009 by Maria 5 Comments

Well, maybe she won’t burst your bubble, but looking at Carrie Ashton will definitely help you bust your nut…in a good way, of course.

Ms. Ashton returns to the blog in another mini-video I shot of her when she was here last week.

I want to take this opportunity to say a few things about shooting videos for the blog. The first thing is that when we started this blog, they gave us a bunch of rules to follow about getting videos and when and where we could shoot and not to interrupt anyone and a bunch of other very restrictive guidelines when it came to the models, etc. The second thing I want to say is that I took all those guidelines and threw ’em out the window. 😛

I just happen to think its much more fun to barge into the studio and interrupt photoshoots (Especially when the model is naked and playing with toys!) and just shoot away. Not all of the editors do it that way, but I happen to think that my way of shooting is very, um, me? It’s my personality. My way of seeing the boobs I love. It’s my, um, vision? lol

(And I am sorry for the shaky camerawork! I am getting better at it, but I get so excited and hyper that I start bouncing around!) 😀

Regardless, I will take this time on the blog to apologize to the studio staff for my guerrilla-style blog videography and to our photographer, Peter, who graciously let me put him behind schedule and take Carrie away from him during his shoot. You are a gentleman and a scholar, Peter.

(But in all honesty, how else would I have gotten this video and how else would you know that she likes classic cars and can be wooed with chicken wings? Sometimes you have to get in there and take what you want, right? 😉 )

For now, enjoy Carrie and these bubbles. I must say, I was told that blowing bubbles relieves stress and I have to agree. Not one time while watching Ms. Ashton twirl around naked and blow bubbles did I feel stressed. LOL

xoxo

Maria

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Blow Job 101 With Renee Ross!

October 11, 2009 by Maria 11 Comments

I don’t always start off a blog with blatant cursing, but…

Holy Fucking Shit…

I love Renee Ross.

Renee is probably one of the greatest busties in the universe and that is because not only is she a sweetheart, but she is also saving lives with these instructional videos. (Okay, maybe not saving lives, but damn it, she is doing a public service of some sort. Somewhere out there, someone is going to benefit from these videos BIG TIME.)

A few days ago, Renee gave us a lesson in titty-fucking, and I must say, it was awesome. But it does not compare to the greatness of this BJ How-To. Renee could, and I say this with the utmost respect and awe, teach anyone how to suck the chrome off a bumper. 🙂 If you are reading this blog right now and currently have a girlfriend or a wife or a special lady in your life, bring her to the computer, sit her down and make her watch this video with you. Tell her it’s, like, “couples” stuff to “better your connection.” Chicks eat that shit up. Trust me.

What this really is is an excuse to get a blow job from that lady in your life. A blow job where you and Renee call the shots. Watch the video. Furrow your brow and look like you are concentrating…like you are soaking this up. Like you are watching something on Discovery Channel. Then look over and say something to your gal pal like,”I think that if you did something like that to my penis, it would really enhance fellatio for me.” (Use the words penis and fellatio! It sounds like you are thinking with and communicating from the head above your shoulders. If you use the words cock and blow job, well, then it just sounds like you wanna fuck your lady friend’s face, and chances are she will not be into it. 🙂 )

I promise that if you watch this with a woman and you have her apply some of Renee’s meat-to-mouth techniques, you will get a better blow job than you have had in a long time. Renee’s blow-job mojo is that strong. She has, like, The Force when it comes to siphoning sperm with her kisser.

Enjoy this video, gentlemen, and may you win in the fight for better BJs!

xoxo

Maria

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Nipple clamps…OMG! or WTF?!

October 10, 2009 by Maria 7 Comments
Clamps: Yay or Nay? We don't know about you, but Diane Poppos seemed to like them!

Clamps: Yay or Nay? We don't know about you, but Diane Poppos seemed to like them!

Ah, tits.

Amazing how two fleshy orbs can inspire so many, right?

Their magic knows no bounds, and thank goodness for that because there is nothing that I like to do more than to sit at my desk and ponder over breasts. Sometimes I like to think about the weight of them or how a certain woman’s tits would feel against my head, but today, I got to thinking about nipple clamps, of all things.

Why? Because nipple clamps fall into a strange category for me. They are, like, um, the Area 51/Aliens of tit accessories. (Bear with me. I know you just went,”Area 51/Aliens? WTF?” but I am typing in stream of consciousness and I promise it will make sense soon. lol) Nipple clamps are an enigma to me. I have never used them myself, but I have heard of their existence. I have never seen them, but I know they are out there and that people believe in them.

Frankly, I don’t know squat about these little clip-on thingies for your nipples…which is why I took it upon myself to ask around.

I asked, “Nipple clamps…are they, like, thumbs up, ‘Oh, my GOD!’ or are they, like, no, ‘What The Fuck?’ for you?”

Corina Curves feels the suction and pinch and hey, it looks pretty damn good.

Corina Curves feels the suction and pinch and hey, it looks pretty damn good.

And you know what? I got a pretty good rundown from the chicks in the office, which I will share with you.

The first girl I asked is Michelle, our web project coordinator. (Hi Micheelllll!! 🙂 ) She said she had never used them and that she didn’t know squat about them, either. (It made me feel less inexperienced, so ty!)

Then I asked Dani, one of our webmasters, and lo and behold, she had used them before! And here is what she had to say:

“I’ve used them before, I think because a guy I was with wanted me to. They just felt like someone pinching/pulling your nipples, but, like, more constant. I dunno, I think I just did it to try it. It’s, like, another form of nipple play. They’re okay. But I have them pierced now, so I much prefer that.”

And there you have it. That, believe it or not, was enough of a testimony that I feel like I could possibly use them in the future…maybe. lol (Thank you, Dani, for your wisdom. 😉 )

Now what I want to know is have any of you guys used clamps on a girl before? Or…on yourselves? (Rawr…kinky!) Let me know. I would love to hear your stories.

xoxo,

Maria

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