Maserati returns to SCORELAND today. What. A. Fucking. View. This girl never ceases to amaze.
On another subject, I was at the grocery store the other day and, while waiting in line at the checkout, I checked out the cover of the new issue of Cosmopolitan. The main headline was “101 HOT SEX MOVES” with the sub-head, “This master list will rock your body and blow your mind!”
Really? Seriously? I didn’t look inside because I knew I’d be disappointed.
Somehow, I knew the list wouldn’t include any of the following:
1. Having him squat over you so you can suck his balls.
2. Saliva strings.
3. Sucking his cock after it just came out of your pussy.
4. Sucking his cock after it just came out of your ass.
5. Licking his butthole and keeping your eyes open while you’re doing it, always looking up at your guy.
6. Moaning, “Oh, stick your big cock in my ass” while he’s banging you from behind.
7. Getting a boob job.
8. If he likes shaved pussy, letting him shave your pussy while he fucks your ass.
9. If he likes hairy pussy, growing it out for months, years.
10. Letting him fuck you in the missionary position while his favorite porn film with his favorite busty porn star is playing on the monitor above your head.
Did I miss anything? I’m sure if we really try, we can come up with 101 hot sex moves.
Skype? Nah. Let's go for a face-to-face office meeting.
Sirale debuted in a XXX scene last week at SCORELAND. Now she shows how she handles being The Hot Office Girl.
Our rating? A+.
Any guy can happily spend his days at the office with someone who looks like Sirale, especially if you were the chosen one to get pulled by her into an empty conference room (with a lock) for a titty hanging, booty popping lunch break.
Anyone have a co-worker who has tits like Sirale’s? Maybe she works down the hall. Maybe she’s the front-desk receptionist.
A few years ago, “Scorecard” received a letter from J.K. who faced an office hottie dilemma.
“I have kind of a predicament. I work with a lady who would be just perfect for Voluptuous. She has huge jugs, at least E-cups, probably even bigger. She’s also very attractive in the face and body, with long, blonde hair and blue eyes. As far as I know, she doesn’t have a steady boyfriend, but she does date quite a bit, but mostly the guys are jerks, to hear her tell it. What can we do to get her photographed? Since we work together, I’m afraid of getting into trouble if I approach her directly myself. I’m dying to see her naked, and having her pose may be the only way.”
Our answer was: How are we supposed to explain to her that we know she even exists? She would know someone who knows her told us about her. Maybe you could enlist the help of one of her female friends who you trust. When a woman tells another woman how great she looks and she should be a model, it goes over much better than when the same thing comes from a guy. Try to somehow subtly let your co-worker know about our website, SCOREModelsWanted.com.”
The philanthropy behind this letter touched me deeply. Here was a guy who wanted to help us out and, by default, the Boob Brotherhood of SCORE and Voluptuous readers instead of helping himself. He could have tried asking the office hottie out on a date or for a drink after work at the local happy hour watering hole, but instead he chose to be a Boob Bro. We never heard back from him, so his office hottie situation remained a mystery.
While I’m immersed in office hottie lore, here are some other office hotties that turn your brain into oatmeal.
Siri’s a bra-buster. Tomorrow, she’s a dust-buster.
Tomorrow at SCORELAND, you get to enjoy Siri dressed as a hot maid. Cosplay is always welcome, especially with a girl like Siri. (Let’s face it, there are NO girls LIKE Siri. She’s one of a kind.)
Siri joins a group of SCORE and V-Girls who kill the traditional fantasy maid’s outfit, something no real maid has ever worn unless her boss is a rich horndog and likes to watch his maid clean as he sits in an easy chair sipping a cognac. Which I would do if I had the money.
This kind of maid’s outfit is strictly for a couple’s bedroom, a fantasy photo shoot, a Halloween party or a bad British stage farce.
I wonder what Siri wears at Halloween parties. She has two belts in karate. Maybe she goes as a ninja? She’s also a Harry Potter fan. Maybe she goes as Luna Lovegood?