May 3, 2017 by Dave
Vanessa is certainly worthy of a start-to-finish jack.
The new poll question, “When you masturbate, how often do you start and finish with the same model?”, was something I was thinking about this morning. Perhaps the question should have been worded, “Do you start and finish with the same photo or video of the same model?” I know for me, it’s a rare occasion that I do. I’ll start somewhere and end up somewhere else, and most of the time, I have no idea where I’m going to end up. Something slips into my mind. Then I think, “Oh, that girl,” or “Oh, that scene.” It’s one of the great things about the Internet; you can switch from one girl to another, one scene to another, almost seamlessly. In the old days, I used to have to keep a pile of SCOREs and Vmags by my side. Actually, I still do. As I’m writing this, every issue of SCORE and Vmag dating back to the very beginning is to my left.
So, today at SCORELAND, I’ll probably start with the new photos and videos of Vanessa Y., but is that where I’ll finish? Will I stay loyal to Vanessa? Judging by my history, probably not.
How about you?
September 9, 2015 by Dave
These are Larissa's work boots.
Did you know that farm girls wear fuck-me shoes around the barn?
I didn’t, and that’s one of the things that makes this picture (and today’s posting) of Larissa Linn special. Larissa isn’t worried about getting her heels stuck in the hay. She’s more interested in going for a roll in the hay. Or a hay ride. Or making hay.
By the way, other photos in this set prove, once and for all, that Larissa is built like a brick shithouse. Of course, there’s video proof, too.
Today at SCORELAND. Tissues not included.
Before I leave you for the day, a question. According to the current poll, 5% of you don’t masturbate. Just wondering: Why?
August 20, 2015 by Dave
Jack off to Lila Lovely and her huge naturals today at XLGirls.com.
I was shocked by a story I read on Nate Silver’s website FiveThirtyEight.com. According to Indiana University’s National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, only about 12% of men between the ages of 25 and 69 masturbate more than four times a week, and the average frequency goes down with age. More shockingly, about 25% of all men have not masturbated once in the past year.
Why must people lie about such a worthwhile hobby? As Woody Allen once said, “Don’t knock masturbation. It’s sex with someone you love.”
The sweet spot in this poll seemed to be “a few times per month or monthly,” a number which I also found hard to believe considering the popularity of the Internet and the main reason for its popularity.
Are there people who just watch porn? I’m not talking about watching porn as a prelude to sex. I mean people who watch porn or look at hot photos and videos of big-boobed women for the sole purpose of just enjoying them without masturbating?
Really?
Okay, people who watch porn probably jack more often than people who don’t. But am I really to believe that so many people don’t watch porn?
I think the world would be a better place if everyone jacked at least once a day.
I also think the world would be a better place if people stopped lying to pollsters.
September 17, 2012 by Elliot James
The first impressions are in, and here’s what a selection of SCORELANDERS have to say about the amazing Roxi Red in her first two photo sets and videos.
Vince: “Having the most wonderful time of my life, Roxi, at 4:15 am after keeping it up for two hours! How can a 71 yo horny guy get any sleep? You’ve brought me back to when I saw Virginia Bell at the Palace Burlesque here in Buffalo, hand firmly on cock. Any chance for a little something special for Invincible? Can’t break any longer. Desperate to get back into action. Hopefully til near dawn.”
Maddien: “Fantastic debut! She proves that she’s very sensual and made for sex as well. I like her high vibes. A 100 percent sexy and sensual woman.”
Nigella: “Aw, I was hoping she’d be wearing the red bra in the debut pic set! Never mind, Roxi is an amazing discovery, what a figure! I’m sure SCORELAND will make the most of this great lady. The write up for the video mentioned bra shopping. Can we have a vid where she tries a load of bras on please! And then a secretary video, a nurse video, a shower in lingerie video, the works!!!!”
JCB: “What an AWESOME debut !! Roxi is going to be a SCORE star without a doubt. LET’S HAVE MORE PLEASE!!”
Hans Hermansson: “I have tried to express my feelings about Roxi Red but it is difficult. She is just the most gorgeous babe to ever walk this planet, the kind of woman I have always dreamed of. So, please, SCORE, make the most of her, please, and post many, many, many pic sets and videos of her. Can’t wait for updates. Thanks.”
Today, Roxi takes things into her own hands. So get a grip while Roxi gets a grip.
I think it’s safe to say Roxi’s a hit at SCORELAND.
A little tug'll do ya.
May 19, 2012 by Maria
I am going to start this post off by saying that I don’t have a dick. I know this because I was born a woman. Also, because I checked just now, and nope, I am sans penis.
But today I am going to have a serious discussion with you about jerking off.
I will give you a moment to process that.
Okay, now your next thought should naturally be, “Why is Maria, the notoriously busty, obviously female editor of V-mag, going to talk to ME about cocking the gun? About choking the chicken? About firing the Surgeon General? About the rise and fall of Peter the Great? About one-man tug of war? About the five-digit disco? Why is Maria talking to me about saying hello to my little friend?”
Well, the answer is simple and yet, not really so simple. You see, I am going to talk to you about punching the munchkin because upon seeing the new Tenga 3D Spirals in our warehouse, I stopped and said, “How the fuck do you use one of those things?”
Here is the thing, fellas…I am a chick. We have all sorts of toys and gadgetry aimed at helping us achieve the big “O”, and even better, achieving our “O” face. For us, toys are a commonplace thing. You open our bedside table drawers and you will find things that buzz, plug a variety of holes and, more than likely, a lube we enjoy. It’s all in there. We buy this shit, I promise you.
But guys, well, you guys have long been reduced to using just your hand.
Think about that.
You, the owners of tools for every job under the sun, have no tools for your, um, tools.
Why is that?
Guys love gadgets and gizmos. They love technology and all that comes with it. So why are you guys still jacking off like cavemen?
And before you say, “My hand works just fine…” let me just say, “Hi, I have hands, too. And fingers. Nice to meet you.”
Because we chicks could use our hands to rub one out, too. And we do, in a pinch when our vibrators are not around or out of batteries. But women will tell you…our toys take us to the promised land every time and much faster and more intensely than just double-clicking our own mouse with our fingers. I promise you. If you put two women side-by-side and asked them to masturbate until they came…like a bust-a-nut race if you will…the lady with the toy would win every time. She would probably have a bunch of orgasms before the lady and her hand even got warmed up.
Why?
Because toys are designed for us to cum harder and faster than we do when we just use our hands. And now, through the miracle of modern fucking science, you can cum harder and faster than you do by just using your hands.
No, it’s true. I can’t even make this shit up.
But I figured since you are men and you need proof and visual aids and stuff that I would grab a Tenga off the shelf and acquaint myself with the art of jacking off with one. And that’s exactly what I did and documented with the help of one of our helpful photogs in the SCORELAND studio.
First off, the Tenga is fucking cool looking. It comes in a case that makes it look like something you would buy at one of those cool, “I’m a man and I love gadgets” stores. You can leave this thing on your nightstand and it won’t scream LOOK AT ME! I’M A TOY FOR YOUR DICK! And it feels awesome, too. I mean, the minute I held it, I thought, “Wow, if I had a dick, I would totally want to put it in this thing.”
And then…I used the Tenga 3D Spiral.
What transpired will go down in “Chick using a guy’s jack aid” history.
But don’t take my word for it because seeing is believing.
Below, you will find a step-by-step guide on how to jerk off with a Tenga 3D Spiral, written and directed by someone without a penis. I think that because I don’t have a dick, I am the perfect candidate to tell you how to jerk off with one of these. Mostly because I have tits and also because I am very thorough. 🙂
So check it out, and then, if you are so inclined, click HERE and check out how to get your hands on (and your dick in) a Tenga 3D Spiral.
They are priced pretty well. Trust me. I payed almost $200 for a toy once. And it needed batteries. This thing doesn’t need any batteries. It runs on man power. That’s good for the environment. That makes you a hero. 🙂
And the cleanup is pretty easy, too. They even give you a stand for it to dry on.
Clearly, whoever designed this HAS a penis.
I’m just the gal who is going to show you how to use it on your penis.
It’s 2012…you have gadgets and technology for every room in your house, your car and your life. Isn’t it time to upgrade your jack game, too?
STOP JACKING OFF LIKE A CAVEMAN!
Welcome to the future.
xoxo,
Maria
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Place the Tenga on the stand, halfway up until it dries (about 1/2 hour) and then push it all the way down, put the lid back on it and store. OR leave it on your night stand. It’s a conversation piece. Like a good book on a coffee table.
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Once it’s flipped, clean off the outside.
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Then flip the Tenga inside out under the water.
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Take your Tenga to a sink and rinse it under running, warm water.
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Place the toy on the convenient tray for temporary storage while you collect yourself and wonder why you didn’t buy one of these sooner.
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Stroke. Stroke. Stroke. Say something like, “Oh, fuck! This feels amazing!” and then shoot your load inside of the Tenga.
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Slide your dick inside the Tenga.
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Get your dick ready for the ride of its life.
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Crack open the lube and put it all over the ridge at the opening of the Tenga and pour some inside.
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The Tenga comes with a convenient packet of lube. You can purchase more lube on the eboobstore with your order.
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You will note that the ridges and spirals are now on the inside, waiting to take your dick to heaven, man.
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Once you do that, it should look like this.
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Grab the Tenga and turn it inside out.
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The spiral texture you are looking at is actually the INSIDE of the Tenga. These spirals and ridges are going to stroke your dick.
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Take off the case’s lid and voila! Your Tenga awaits.
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The Tenga comes in an awesome case that makes for convenient storage. Like a garage for your cock gizmo.
