GUEST BLOGGER: Jenna Valentine
(Dear Dave, I see your Arianna Video and I raise you this blog by the one and only Jenna Valentine. I figured the only way to trump a video from the Bahamas was to let Jenna, who was ACTUALLY there, tell you guys what it was like to frolic with the busties. And of course, she has some pics of all the behind the scenes action for you, too. Dave, I may be saying this prematurely, but…I WIN. lol xoxo, Maria 🙂 Take it away, Jenna…)
Oh, hi, SCORELAND Members!
This is Jenna Valentine, taking over the SCORELAND Blog for a hot mess of a minute. Somehow, I got permission to write a blog about my trip to the Bahamas. But before that, I’d like to officially announce (imagine dramatic royal horns playing!) that I got my first bra fitting! Okay, that’s boring, but the good news is (Well, at least for you guys, not my for my bra-buying wallet!) that I am a 36H! I don’t know how this happened. I’d like to thank the Academy and my good genes. I’ve had big boobs since fourth grade. I had D-cups by age 11. (Writing that made me feel creepy, and now I think Chris Hansen is behind me.) Anyway, I have no idea where these came from. No one in my family has big boobs. I am the only one. My mom (who’s a MILF by the way, guys!) is super petite. She’s 5″ and 100 lbs. (Now you know where I get my epic height from.) But my boobs? No idea. I just text-messaged my grandma and asked her if I was in some sort of nuclear accident area when I was born.
Okay, enough about my boobs. No just kidding. Let’s talk about more boobs. I was recently asked to take a trip to the Bahamas to pose for SCORE, and I said YES! (Exactly like that, without thinking.) Let’s be honest, I am obviously not one for the sun. Look at me. I have porcelain, fragile, vampire skin. I am also just a little scared of the ocean. (I have a lot of phobias.) However, I’d never turn down a chance to pose with some huge-boobed hotties in a private house on an island. Would you? No. (If your answer was yes, then I don’t know what to think or say about you.)
Let me tell you about the hot ladies I got a chance to bunk with. (This sounds like summer camp! A naked big-boob summer camp.) First, there’s Karla James. Karla looks even more innocent and young in person. She has a very sweet face and her boobs are huge. Gigantic. Bigger than mine! I was shocked. I’ve never met anyone with boobies bigger than mine. She says she’s a G, but I’m thinking GGGGG. Then there’s Taylor Steele, and she is HILARIOUS. She’s the funniest, hottest chick ever…with huge knockers. Her boobs were also bigger than mine. (Seeing a pattern here, guys?) But let’s talk about Arianna Sinn! This girl is the sweetest, most-adorable girl on this planet. I don’t know what it was about her. Maybe it was her accent and the way she said some words that made my heart skip a beat! She was my roommate, but unfortunately we did not share a huge bed together. I was sick when I arrived in the Bahamas, so we had separate beds. But if there’s ever a time where I can room with her again, don’t you worry, I’d share a bed with her without even thinking. I’d spoon her with my boobs. Oh, I forgot to mention, Arianna’s tits were the biggest. I’ve never been the one with the smallest boobs in the group. I seriously felt flat-chested next to these girls! It was unbelievable. I came in thinking I had huge boobs, and I was out-boobed by three other girls! Standing next to Taylor, I’d look down at my shirt and go, “Oh.” I was super-disappointed!
I think my favorite part of the trip was actually going into the ocean with these girls. I haven’t been in a bikini or the ocean for about 10 or more years, but why would I ever say no to an opportunity to go jump up and down topless with three other hot chicks with HUGE boobs? We had sand fights, took off our tops, swam in the ocean, rolled over, rubbed sand on each other’s boobs and ran slowly down the beach topless like a topless Baywatch episode.
I had four wonderful days of watching girls get wet in the ocean, rub down their boobs with lotion and baby oil, get hosed down, put on sexy lingerie like garters (which are my absolute favorite!), jump up and down, do cartwheels (Karla did them, though she refused to do it for the camera!), try on bras, rub each other’s boobies, slap each other’s asses and shake their asses, too (That was mostly Taylor, though.).
I’ll miss my three big-boobed girls, and I hope one day we can all do another fun photo shoot! I can’t wait till you guys see us all together in bed in our SCORE tees 🙂 It was like the giant, big-boobed sleepover I always wanted! So ladies, if you’re reading this, I miss you all and I hope one day we can be boob-to-boob again. SCORELAND members, I love you guys and thanks for all your awesome support! I hope you all bought my debut magazine, Voluptuous May 2010, and enjoyed it. (I secretly hope I am someone’s new favorite pin-up girl!) I also hope you guys enjoyed my blog. I am the least-serious person so I wanted to make this funny to read!
I can’t wait until you guys get to see our sexy Bahama shoots!
Love you guys,
XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Jenna Valentine