Kerry Marie is spectacular. Kerry Marie covered in oil? Jack-tacular!
Terry Nova is ready to wrap her oiled orbs on your cock.
Jezhabelle looks like she enjoys a good greasin'!
Carmen Hayes is like a little, greasy pretzel from Big-Tit Heaven.
Oh, Annie Swanson, pour some sugar on me!
Angela White could slide her perkies all over me, any day.
Let’s make something very clear: Tits are wonderful, wonderful things.
Now I want to make this statement: OIL MAKES TITS BETTER.
It is absolutely, 100 percent true. You can be staring at the most-marvelous boobies in the whole entire universe and they are good, but, add some oil all over those orbs and WHAMMO! they get much better. It’s something about the greasiness that just elevates them to the next level. It’s the shiny, slick wonder of them that makes you want to run your hands over their lubricated surface.
And now that we are on the subject, how great do oily tits feel, eh? Marvelous! I could rub on a pair of slippery tits all day. Oil is, like, synonymous with horny, good times. I would love to high-five every model who ever greased up for boob play. I mean, think about it. Think about a room full of naked chicks…pretty hot, right? Now imagine them covered in oil and just slippin’ and slidin’ all over the place.
(Seriously, this is the reason why the our dick-flick, B.L.O.W., Busty Ladies of Oil Wrestling, starring Cherry Brady, Angela White, Brandy Talore and Annie Swanson is one of my all-time faves. It’s greasy goodness and rough play, and there are four busty ladies wrestling. How can that combo NOT rock your jock? You can get a copy at the eBoobstore, and you SHOULD get a copy. )
For now, please peruse some of my oily favorites in all of their slick lustrous bustiness.
The pictorial posting today on SCORELAND is Crystal Gunns’ strangest photo shoot, in my opinion. We’ve done some unusual themes with Crystal, but this one, a fetish-costumed woman in a wire cage in a warehouse with cash whipped up by the wind, is pretty odd. When I first saw it, I thought it was one of those “keep as many dollars as you can grab” deals like they have in those glass booths on game shows.
Tell ya something, Crystal could be a hot female oil wrestler.
And today is Busty Dusty’s birthday. Here’s to her!
This week’s poll asks if you’ve ever walked up to a woman you didn’t know and asked her if you could feel her tits. I don’t care if you were drunk or completely lucid when you popped the question, I just want to know. By the way, hookers and strippers don’t count!
Last week’s poll asked for your feelings about photos and videos of busty, pregnant women. The most popular answer at 45% was “I don’t like them,” but 32% of respondents said they loved them and 18% said they liked them, which means those in favor of seeing busty, pregnant women outnumbered those not in favor by 50% to 45%. Only 5% said, “I don’t care as long as I knocked her up.”
Now for some notes from the weekend.
1. The “Best of the Decade” contest had its first tie on Saturday. Sarah Mercury and Brandy Dean finished with an identical number of votes. Brandy ended up at No. 77 because our computer is programmed to eliminate the model who reaches the losing vote total first. But Sarah lasted only one more day and ended up at No. 76. Congratulations to both ladies. Brandy is one of the horniest on-camera fuckers I’ve ever seen (she loves black cock). As I’ve mentioned, Sarah was a huge favorite among V-Men during the early years of this decade. Whenever we put her on the cover, issues of V-Mag flew off the racks.
2. Susan Sarandon’s daughter, Eva Amurri, has been displaying her very nice, naked rack on the TV show Californication. According to news reports, Susan Sarandon (who’s very nicely racked herself and looked highly jackable in The Rocky Horror Picture Show) had no problems with her 24-year-old daughter getting naked. It’s good to know that nice tits and exhibitionism run in the family.
3. Finally, the Orange County Register reports, “Denise Richards has downsized her breasts. So has Victoria Beckham, along with Tara Reid, Sharon Osbourne, and Tamra Barney of Real Housewives of Orange County…Enough stars have reduced their chest size recently that celebrity watchers have declared it a trend, even though other stars from Heidi Montag to Pamela Anderson have chosen to expand their breasts.” Must’ve been a slow news day. Please, I’m searching, show me the 100% straight man who likes small tits more than big tits and the woman with A-cups or B-cups who doesn’t want C-cups or D-cups. Now that would be a story.
Last weekend, Kiko Lee provided the hooter and hand relief to a restless weiner. This weekend, it’s a SCORELAND happy ending with Alia Janine! Alia talks to our intrepid SCORE reporter, demonstrates her considerable boob skills and shows off her tasty exotic dancing talents before we wheel in the stunt-man for a super-sexy tits and tugs. Thanks, Alia!
I think that every big-boobed woman in the world will agree with me when I say that sometimes having big boobs can be challenging. For example, buying a bra, or rather, FINDING a bra can turn into something like the quest for the holy grail. And finding a bra that fits AND is cute or sexy is like finding a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Yeah, good luck.
Spill Zone! Oops! Mustard: 1 Vixen: 0
One of the big challenges that big-boobers everywhere face is the strange force that pulls anything that can stain and/or spill to your tits. It never fails. One second you are enjoying a bite of food and the next, you are digging for it down your cleavage. Or one second you are drinking something and the next, a magical hole has opened in your chin and said liquid is now all over your shirt and tits.
It happens. A lot, apparently.
In fact, as I was looking at pictures of hot naked chicks, er, researching this topic, I came across some pics of Vixen LaMoore and lo and behold, like clockwork, while eating a hotdog, mustard attacked her tits. (Now who can blame that mustard, though? Wouldn’t you want to attack Vixen LaMoore’s tits?) It’s like big boobs are magnets that attract everything from men to spills of mustard.
And then of course you have to get a napkin and wet it and rub on your boobs and your shirt and your boobs through your shirt and before you know it, you are putting on a semi-erotic rub-show for everyone who is watching. (Not that they mind.) Who could look away while a woman is digging in her tits and rubbing them vigorously?
Now, some of you guys out there in blogland have big-breasted wives and girlfriends. Does this
Doesn't the look on Vixen's face scream, "Please lick this off my body!"?
happen to them a lot? Spills on the rack and bits of this and that down the cleavage tunnel? I would love to hear your stories.
A great week at SCORELAND and .XLGirls.com culminates Saturday with Renee’s first on-camera fuck. On Tuesday, we saw her give a great hand job and tit-fuck. On Thursday, she showed off her spectacular, sloppy-slurping blow job skills. Next: Renee goes all the way!
Now, I wasn’t there for the big event, but I’ve seen the video, and it’s pretty spectacular. I mean, Renee has J-cup naturals, and do you know what happens when a girl with tits that size hops on top of a cock and bounces up and down? Yeah, that’s right: Her tits bounce wildly. I was there, however, for the post-fuck interview. Yeah, I said post-fuck interview. This wasn’t like those post-game interviews you see in the baseball playoffs where reporters ask questions like, “How did it feel to get the game-winning hit?” and the game-winning hitter responds, “It felt great.” In this post-fuck interview, we stare at Renee’s tits, which are pouring out of a tight top, while freshly-fucked Renee watches herself fuck on camera for the first time. Watching a girl watching herself might not sound special, but just watch. I love this video.
Renee Ross is breaking her on-camera cherry this week at SCORELAND and XLGirls.com (tits ‘n’ tugs scene Tuesday, blow job today, full sex Saturday), and that got me and Elliot James talking about the best XXX debuts in SCORELAND history. As usual, we differ on our favorites, so I’ll go first, Elliot will go second. Here are my Top 3 big-tit XXX first-times:
Susie Wilden's first time…on camera, that is.
1. Susie Wilden. Susie is a cutie with a pretty face, a sexy British accent and massive tits, and she’s horny as hell, too. So I knew her first time would be special. What I didn’t know was that she’d break her on-camera cherry by taking a big dick in her ass. I love the horny look on her face in that scene.
Now massively stacked, Autumn-Jade takes the XXX plunge.
2. Autumn-Jade. Autumn’s return in 2002 was a big story, made bigger by the fact that she had put on weight and most of it had gone to her tits. Now massively stacked, Autumn fucked like a porn pro in her XXX debut (she played an enlistee who fucks her drill commander). The only drawback of this scene was that her partner could’ve had a bigger cock.
3. Brandy Talore. The girl has gone on to become a huge porn star,
Brandy Talore: So cute, yet there's a cock in her mouth!
but when she did her first XXX scene for us, everyone in the office was shocked. I mean, here was this midwestern girl-next-door who didn’t even like to talk dirty. Now she was fucking and sucking a stranger’s cock on camera and loving every minute of it. I used to walk past Elliot’s cubicle just to see the photo he had of sweet Brandy with a cock in her mouth.
Okay, Elliot. Let’s hear your Top 3.
Alright, Dave. But I’m going to be much more longwinded than you. First off, I hate the term “boy-girl.” If I was a porn dude, I wouldn’t want to be called boy. My top three in the 17 years SCORE has been in existence? In no special order, using magazine cover dates, Linsey Dawn McKenzie (January ’02), Minka (September ’95) and Autumn-Jade (May ’02). I was going to say Dawn Stone (August ’01) instead of Autumn, but although both are Southern belles, wide-eyed Autumn was the last chick I thought would ever do a hardcore scene just because her personality is so innocent and virginal. Yeah, I’m real perceptive.
LDM: Absolutely the most-anticipated XXX debut in big-tit history.
About Linsey. She wowed everyone for years after her official USA debut in 1996 at 18 years young and always pushed the offers of hardcore to the side. After she did her first, with her then-husband, we asked her how she felt that day. “Scared, because lots of things were channeling through my mind,” LDM said. “Things like, ‘Oh my God, this is it. I’m finished. Say goodbye to my career.’ It’s very nerve wracking. ‘Will they think I’m good? Am I gonna let everybody down?’ Those were some of the things going through my head. But it went well. At least I think it did.” As it turned out, it was one of those scenes that both jolted you, because it was Linsey actually fucking, and it also excited you because of how great she looked with a cock in her mouth and pussy.
Minka was on her way to becoming a mega-buster when she fucked on camera for the first time.
About Minka. First I should say that her mag pictorial was softcore because that was how the newsstand standards were then. (The video version was full XXX.) There was no Internet. Tweets were bird sounds outside your window that woke you up. Minka was one of the few to step outside the box and do hardcore. The list of SCORE stars of the ’90s who kept to stripping and refused to try it was fairly lengthy, among them Pandora Peaks, Busty Dusty, Traci Topps, Nikki Knockers, Tawny Peaks, Colt 45,Toppsy Curvey, Colt 45 and Danni Ashe. So Minka joined a small group of mega-boobed babes (Kayla Kleevage, Lisa Lipps, Wendy Whoppers and Tiffany Towers) who became big porn stars. And Minka’s still going strong to this day, iron-clad proof of her popularity and longevity.
Renee Ross has a good chance of finding her way onto both of our lists. Check out her blow job style today at SCORELAND and imagine that you’re on the receiving end.
Remember the August 18th blog entry by our 18eighteen and XLGirls editor Allie about office life here at SCORELAND? Instead of writing a similar piece, I thought I’d illustrate it with cartoons.
Last week we asked you to tell us what type of busty model is your favorite. Astonishingly,mega-boobed came in first at 27%, followed by plumper at 22%; young, slim and natural at 22%; over 30 and natural at 17%; over 30 and augmented at 7%; and young, slim and augmented at 5%. Why do I say it’s so astonishing that mega-boobed came in first? Because many of the first 19 models eliminated in the “Best of the Decade” contest at SCORELAND are, indeed, mega-boobed! What the hell is going on here?
Two girls from the Top 100: Africa (#88) patiently waits as Cassitty (#82) sucks. Several years ago, the girls went tit-to-tit in the "Big Tit Challenge," and the cock-stiffening blow-by-blow is still posted at Scoreland.
This week’s poll asks, “How do you feel about pregnant photo sets?” Love them? Like them? Hate them? Don’t care as long as the girl has big tits? Let us know.
But let’s go back to the “Best of the Decade” contest for a second. Now, we’re all adults here, so let’s be open about what’s going on: So far, every single one of the 19 models who have been eliminated has been either 1.) Enhanced or 2.) Black. I could comment further on this, but I’m not going to because I’ll just get emotional. I will say this: My No. 1. of the decade is black, so you know where I stand on the issue.
By the way, congratulations to Cassitty for coming in at No. 82, a very fair and impressive ranking that places her in the top 10% of all newcomers this decade. When it comes to sucking cock, though, Cassitty is in the top 1%.
Check out this video for a very important announcement from our very own Renee Ross. Renee’s SCORELAND and XLGirls.com special “Wham! Bam! Thank You, M’am” kicks off Tuesday, October 13. Part two is Thursday, October 15 and part three is Saturday, October, 17. Don’t miss it!
