Tag Archive: Desmond Morris

More science of Boobonics or advanced Breastology 202

November 17, 2011 by Elliot James
Can SCORE Model of the Year Eva cum from nipple play?

Can 2010 SCORE Model of the Year Eva Notty cum from nipple play?

The belief that women can reach orgasm by breast stimulation alone is proposed by sexologists Marshall Miller and Dorian Solot, authors of I Love Female Orgasm: An Extraordinary Orgasm Guide. Their studies indicate that 1% of women report the ability to achieve the Big O through manual stimulation of their breasts. That’s a tiny percentage. I’ve read elsewhere that it’s 2%, not much of an increase.

Female Blog readers, feel free to chime in on this. Have you had an orgasm through breast and nipple arousal alone, either by fingers, a vibrator or a breast pump?

A study published in the Annals of Plastic Surgery that examined the breasts of approximately 600 women provided statistical evidence that the left breast is bigger than the right, proving that it’s totally normal for a woman’s boobs to be unequal in size. It‘s an old wives tale that if a woman‘s left breast is bigger than the right during pregnancy, she’s having a girl, and if the right is bigger, the baby will be a boy. Thanks to the Internet, those old wives have made a big contribution to misinformation.

Shyla's right boob is bigger than her left.

Shyla's right boob is bigger than her left.

Mating was so much easier generations ago. That's Rachel Love from Mamazon.

Mating was so much easier generations ago. That's Rachel Love from Mamazon.

Evolutionary psychologists, and a lot of other brainy dudes, have always theorized why we prefer women with large boobs. (Dave wrote about zoologist Desmond Morris comparing tits to asscheeks in an October 22 Blog.) Historically, large boobs are a sign of fertility. Check out any ancient statue of a fertility goddess, although none of them even come close to Leanne Crow or Jenna Valentine in sheer stacktitude. Harvard anthropologist Frank Marlowe’s study, The Nubility Hypothesis, theorizes that females evolved protruding breasts because the size and shape of breasts function as a signal of reproductive value to a man. Women with greater reproductive value are preferred by males. Upturned and pointed breasts became “sexual releasers of approach behavior for heterosexual males.” In plain Boobish, a language we are fluent in, chicks with big tits are hotter and attract more potential baby-daddies. That’s the theory, anyway. On the other side of the coin, many guys are not tit-men. Many guys are ass men, others leg men. All I can add is more study is needed. If I can get a grant from Yale, and don’t blow it at my local lap dance club in less than a week, I’ll continue the research.

Why big tits are like ass, or some such nonsense

October 22, 2011 by Dave
This is Valory Irene's ass.

This is Valory Irene's ass.

These are Valory Irene's tits. Is some zoologist telling me her tits look like her ass?

These are Valory Irene's tits. Is some zoologist telling me her tits look like her ass?

The poll currently running on the Blog asks, “Other than breasts, what is your favorite part of a woman’s body?” Not surprisingly, the No. 1 answer so far is ass at 44%. I say not surprisingly because a letter writer, Jack from Chicago, recently reminded me of the zoologist Desmond Morris, who wrote (and I’m definitely paraphrasing here) that big tits remind men of the globular shape of a woman’s buttocks.

Actually, what Morris said (and I’m quoting from Wikipedia, not exactly the most-reliable source) is that “the shape of female breasts evolved as a frontal counterpart to that of the buttocks, the reason being that while other primates mate in the rear-entry position, humans, because of their upright posture, are more likely to successfully copulate by mating face to face, the so-called missionary position. Morris suggested that a secondary sexual characteristic on a woman’s chest would have encouraged this in more primitive incarnations of the human race, and a face-on encounter may have helped found a relationship between partners beyond merely a sexual one.”
In plain English, what we really want to do is fuck a woman from behind, which we can and sometimes do. But when we fuck her face-to-face, her tits remind us of ass and get us hard. So, it’s not surprising that 44% of you like ass second because in your minds, tits are ass. Or something like that.

But you know what? All of this science is confusing. Do you know why I like big tits? Because they get my cock hard. Do you know why I like a girl’s ass? Because it gets my cock hard. Why do these things get my cock hard? Because I like them. Why do I like them?

Okay, all this thinking is making my cock soft. I don’t want my cock to be soft, so I’m going to log into SCORELAND and check out some big tits. I heard that Stephanie Stalls is fucking this weekend. Leanne Crow is getting her tits out. And that’s all I need to know.