Tag Archive: We Saw Your Boobs

Boob trends

February 26, 2013 by Elliot James

Boobs are always trendy.

After Seth MacFarlane brought big boobs to the Academy Awards ceremony, the first 25 pages of Google search were dominated by the public’s and media’s reaction to his song and dance number, “We Saw Your Boobs.”

“We Saw Your Boobs” is not a song here, of course. It’s a way of life. Actually, “Show us your boobs” was the line we used to say on the Boob Cruises.

I’m happy for Seth, but my favorite song still remains Rodney Carrington’s “Titties and Beer.” This song is built into the Jingle Jugs trophy rack, a nifty item that’s just the thing to play for your mother-in-law when she visits.

Another boob trend that’s trending is giving away a boob job as a contest prize. This is also getting a mix of yeas and nays from the populace. Philadelphia radio station Q102 and a clinic are giving away a free breast augmentation to a lucky winner. This seems to be a popular radio station giveaway as they try to attract more female listeners.

A bar owner in Des Moines, Iowa gave away $3,000 gift certificates for a boob job at his three bars this past Mardi Gras. Boob job contests are also held in Buffalo, Tampa and at a lot of other bars around the USA.

The “breasturant” industry, if you can call it that, will be getting a little more crowded as a chain called Twin Peaks spreads its, uh, wings, joining Hooters as another fine dining establishment featuring waitresses in titty-tops. More power to them even though I don’t like chicken wings.

A Twin Peaks is opening in Florida, but it’s going to be too far away for us SCORE lunchers. But experience tells me not to expect the next SCORE covergirl in these places. I’ve never seen a really busty Hooters Girl. By SCORE requirements.

And wrapping up my boob trending studies, I have to mention the best name I’ve seen in a while. She’s a 20 year-old Brit from the TV show Celebrity Big Brother. Her name is Lacey Banghard. That’s her real name. Unfortunately, Lacey got the boot from the Big Brother house by coldhearted voters last month, but I have no doubt she will continue to trend in the news for a long time.

 

Janet Jade was not the model for Jingle Jugs.

 

Where are the big boobs? Not at the Oscars.

February 25, 2013 by Dave

I have no idea what's holding up Ashley Sage Ellison's tits. She probably wouldn't dare wear this to the Oscars.

“Sleeves and Straps Are Barely There” read the New York Times headline about women’s fashion at the Oscars Sunday night. Wrote some blogger I’ve never heard of, “Starlets went strapless in all colors at last night’s Academy Awards. Jennifer Lawrence wore a white Dior haute couture dress” blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Most big-boob girls don't dare wear strapless dresses, but Alexa does.

What the New York Times didn’t tell you is why so many of these “starlets” went strapless and why they were able to go strapless without any fear of a wardrobe malfunction. I am sorry to say this, BUT BIG TITS HAVE BECOME NON-EXISTENT IN HOLLYWOOD.

The art director of SCORE, whose opinion I trust, tells me that TV stars still have big tits, but movie stars have “become so anorexic that their tits disappear.”

Listen, I never thought Jennifer Aniston was stacked, but I never knew she was as flat-chested as she looked Sunday night. When host Seth MacFarlane sang that “We Saw Your Boobs” song, I was looking around like, “Where?” I wasn’t seeing any boobs.

This is, indeed, a tragedy. Once upon a time, many actresses had big tits. These ladies wouldn’t have dared to go strapless in public for two reasons: 1.) the possible wardrobe malfunction; 2.) strapless dresses, shirts and bras minimize, and why would they want to minimize?

All I can say is that the Oscars telecast was totally depressing. Halle Berry doesn’t have huge tits, but she looked like a SCORE Girl compared to her peers. And, no, she didn’t go strapless. She needed something to hold up those puppies.

Aghhhh!