Holly Halston takes two at SCORELAND and in the DVD My Wife, Your Meat!
SCORELAND Blog readers love giving their opinions (which, I guess, is what blogging is all about). Here are the results of recent Blog polls.
First, one of my favorite polls:Which busty mainstream celebrity would you most like to see in a fuck film? Christina Hendricks, the only good reason to endure the plot-less TV show Mad Men, is the winner with an astounding 53%. I think Dexter is one of the best shows on TV. If Christina Hendricks played Dexter’s sister (rather than the spectacularly flat-chested Jennifer Carpenter), it would be the greatest TV show in history (surpassing the episodes of Maude when busty Adrienne Barbeau showed up wearing tight tops). Dolly Parton tied for second with 14%, pretty impressive considering she’s 66 years old. Sofia Vergara also had 14%. Then came Mariah Carey and Salma Hayek. I would have included Jennifer Tilly in the poll, but she’s been faking cleavage and big tits for years (although I certainly appreciate her efforts).
Several months ago, we asked, “What do you like most about women’s bodies after big boobs?” And the winner was…pretty face at 37%. Who says we men are shallow? “Nice pussy” didn’t even finish in the top three (although great ass did at 22%). I asked Elliot this question and he said, “Their brains.”
After watching Stephanie Stalls getting double-pounded at SCORELAND, we asked, “What do you think about DP in girl-boy-boy scenes?
Back in the day, Sierra and Autumn-Jade hooked up in one of the greatest girl-girls ever.
Well, talk about a split-decision…41% said they love it. 35% said they hate it. But 17% also said they like it once in a while, so the majority (58%) wants to see some DP. We’ll see what we can do. Not all girls will do DP. Most girls won’t even do anal.
And, finally, the age-old question, “Do you want to see more girl-girl at SCORELAND?”
You know, I’m always getting letters from guys asking for more girl-girl. And whenever I do, I think, “Unless times have really changed, these guys are in the minority.” Well, they are because 58% turned their thumbs down to more girl-girl.
So, to recap, most of you would like to see Christina Hendricks getting DP’d. I’m definitely in favor of that.
Listen, I know I shouldn’t be going to AOL.com for news, but sometimes I do, and this tagline caught my eye: “Plunging Necklines Dominate SAG Awards,” SAG being the Screen Actors Guild. “Great,” I thought. “Big celebrity tits,” and right off, I should have thought, “Stupid me,” because what celebrity has big tits? I mean really big tits, other than Christina Hendricks from Mad Men, and even she isn’t SCORE big (although she’s welcome to find out).
So I took the leap. I clicked on the link, and that led me to,
Plunging Necklines Dominate the 2011 SAG Awards Red Carpet
once again, and this opening paragraph: “Plunging necklines and daring cleavage dominated the red carpet at the 2011 Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards with Sofia Vergara, Christina Hendricks and Eva Longoris leading the pack.” At which point my eye wandered to six photos of six celebrities, all of whom supposedly were wearing dresses with “plunging necklines” that exposed “daring cleavage.”
Bullshit. All I saw were five not-so-stacked celebrities with plunging necklines that didn’t reveal much and one semi-stacked chick (Christina) who was wearing the least-daring dress of all.
Meanwhile at USMagazine.com,
Cleavage Wars at the SAGs!
Of course, more disappointment. The website asked, “Who won this year’s cleavage awards?” and thank goodness some woman named Susan Zemitas Richmond was smart enough to comment, “The only one with any cleavage is Sofia Vergara. The others are just showing skin.”
Exactly. If you’re a boob man, you had about as much chance at jacking successfully to the SAG Awards as any of these women have of getting into SCORE.
NOTE TO THE REST OF THE WORLD: JUST BECAUSE A WOMAN IS WEARING A LOW-CUT DRESS OR TOP DOESN’T MEAN SHE’S SHOWING CLEAVAGE. IF YOU DON’T HAVE CLEAVAGE, YOU DON’T HAVE ANY TO SHOW! THERE’S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SKIN AND CLEAVAGE.
So, just to set the record straight. Cleavage:
If any of these girls came walking down the red carpet at any awards show, the international media would have a collective heart attack and realize what actual cleavage is all about. And they’d realize that this has nothing to do with cleavage: