Tag Archive: fruit

Roxi’s super boobs in time for the Super Bowl

February 4, 2018 by Elliot James 9 Comments

Nineteen years ago, the Tesco supermarket chain asked its suppliers to grow smaller melons. Psychological experiments revealed that people subconsciously bought melons based on social trends in boob sizes. Smaller breasts were popular at the time. Melon sales soared.

Roxi Red came back from the store with melons but not the size she was looking for. She couldn’t find any melons that measured up to her own enormous, juicy tits. Three of the melons she bought could fit into one of Roxi’s bra KK-cups.

Damn those scientists. Farmers don’t grow ’em big enough anymore to keep up with Roxi.

Melons–or footballs–don’t come close to the size of Roxi Red’s breast fruits.

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Rating: 3.6/5

Minka & the fruit man

March 17, 2017 by Elliot James 3 Comments

Today’s action-packed Minka scene reminded me of a SCORE magazine “Boob Beat” story I did in 2005. There was an Italian sexologist named Piero Lorenzoni who compared fruits to a woman’s breasts and personality. Okay, his theory may have been a little bananas, but that’s what they said about Newton.

Senor Lorenzoni broke it down like this:

A women with breasts like melons may look maternal but isn’t. Said Lorenzoni, “She likes eating and wants to be spoiled and admired. But seldom likes sex.”

Women with lemon-shaped breasts: “These women are full of life and can laugh at themselves.”

Pineapples: “Whoever wins their heart will not lose it quickly.”

Grapefruits: “This woman may look erotic but in reality is bashful and homely. She spoils her partner but prefers tenderness over sex.”

Oranges: “While she is self-confident and knows her goals, she has little interest in sex. She likes conversation.”

Cherries: “Make great partners and are moderately interested in sex.”

Pears: “She can be very religious but is known to have affairs.”

In a boob science experiment, Jim compares fruit to Minka’s mega-boobs. Jim holds up an orange to Minka’s tits. Then some melons. No comparison. Only watermelons would work, and he didn’t bring any. Senor Lorenzoni probably never saw Minka’s pictures during his research. He might have abandoned his project. Minka’s beyond cataloging anyway.

Minka’s famous protruding nipples hypnotize Jim. That’s why Minka’s nickname is “Nipple #1.” I can’t think of any fruit that compares to those always-erect pointers.

Minka wants to see his banana. Strictly for research purposes. Turnabout is fair play.

Starts today at SCORELAND.


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Rating: 3.8/5

Kitchen kitten Tigerr Benson shows how she juices

October 16, 2016 by Elliot James 3 Comments

Tigerr Benson. Finding a Tigerr loose in the kitchen can make a man hungry. Tigerr doesn’t just make fruit salads. She juices fruit. Juices them all over her big, round tits.

I don’t fantasize about Tigerr as the housewife type, but I could tap into that domestic daydream.

Actually, Tigerr does like cooking in and dining out. I asked her. She was in Paris at the time, a city not famous for the “Royale with cheese.”

Tigerr, what’s your favorite restaurant and your favorite dish?

“My current favorite restaurant is Gaggan in Thailand. It’s a 20-course meal. My favorite dishes on a quiet night in is Vongole Spaghetti or Goya Champaru. That’s Okinawan.”

Two videos and a pictorial. Lots of Tigerr today.

Our kind of juicing. A very healthy activity.

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Rating: 4.0/5

How do you like them apples?!

September 11, 2013 by Dave 5 Comments

M-cup newcomer Jennica Lynn, shot on-location in Eleuthera, the Bahamas, returns to XLGirls.com next Tuesday.

Always make sure you have enough fruit in your diet.


Nikky Wilder is ready for her XLGirls.com debut on Monday.

I like laid back girls who get their tits out.

Can you identify the owner of these 110-cm. cans?

This girl debuted Tuesday at XLGirls.com.

September has already been a great month at XLGirls.com, and it’s only going to get better.

By the way, those of you in the UK probably know the name Bex Shiner. Bex was in our studio this week. I don’t know if Big Brother was watching her, but I was. Photos to come. Stay tuned.

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Rating: 3.2/5

Apples and oranges? No, we’re talking melons here. Voluptuous Lola’s big, juicy melons.

May 11, 2012 by Elliot James 6 Comments

Her name is Lola. She is a showgirl, not a fruit stand owner.

Dave blogged about Lola last January, and it’s safe to say that he was impressed. So was I and so was Maria, who put her in the Holiday ’11 V-mag. To prove that absence does make the hard grow harder, Lola’s back at SCORELAND with fresh photos and a video.

This time, Lola put on a fishnet dress and got into a bathtub with a bunch of floating green apples. Maybe the photographer couldn’t find melons that morning. Or the apples were meant to be photographically symbolic of something, like Eve and the apple.

Lola’s full name isn’t Lola Apples like our American dancer/model Candy Apples. Maybe Lola just likes apples. Aroma scientists claim that the scent of green apples reduces stress and headaches in women. Maybe Lola likes the scent. But vibrators can do that, too.

Anyway, a couple of things are 100% certain and provable. Lola has a beautiful face and body and spectacular, homegrown melons. She’s very sexy and she’s always smiling. She has mad toy skills.

I admit that the Czech Republic can chalk up another victory in the International Boobs Race (IBR) thanks to Lola, a race America is clearly losing to east and west Europe and England.

This really burns my bacon. Where are all the American challengers to Czech girls like Lola? How can a tiny nation of 10 million people produce so many top-notch busty girls who enjoy nude modeling while my country hopelessly lags behind in a recessionary period of big-tit growth? American girls with E-cups and bigger need some kind of wake-up call. And the Czechs make better beer than we do, adding insult to injury. I need to get this country back on top in the IBR.

All I can say is, American woman, Be A SCORE Model.

A SCORELAND member named Basenji1 will be very pleased to see Lola back again.  “She has the full package,” he commented back in January. “She ranks along with Arianna Sinn.” Praise doesn’t get any higher than that. Hopefully, we’ll connect again with Lola.

I may not be a poet. But when it comes to apples and melons, I know it.

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Rating: 4.3/5

What I could watch Natalie Fiore do all day

June 19, 2010 by Elliot James 5 Comments
Yes, she has one banana.

Yes, she has one banana.

I’m not into all the craziness. The appeal of farked-up weirdness goes way past me. I don’t like to see bukkakes. And I also feel sorry for the janitor afterwards. Gang bangs? It’s mainly a man show with all the subtlety of a wrecking ball. There’s plenty more wacked-out fringe stuff that I won’t even bother writing about. All I can say is, to each his own and good luck.

Extremely apeeling.

Extremely apeeling.

But Natalie Fiore simply unpeeling a banana and putting it in her mouth? A-ha! That I can watch over and over. Maria wrote two BLOG entries this week, one about fruit play, the other about the greatness of Natalie Fiore. As it turns out by chance (or maybe Maria has precognition), just in time for this Sunday’s SCORE Theater video is Foodie Time With Natalie Fiore. Just give me the simple pleasures in life and I’m content. Natalie coming back from a trip to the grocery store and saying “Teeets” in her sexy accent is all I really need. Pouring honey on her beautiful areolae and licking it off? Lip-smackin’ good. Like I commented, Natalie could turn a breast-man into an Iron Cock Chef in less than two minutes. Check out these vidcaps. (Her scene is video only.)

It's always PMS time with The Mamazons.

It's always PMS time with The Mamazons.

Also this weekend, Chapter Two of Mamazon The Movie starts today. In this episode, the bad-ass Mamazons, led by badder-ass queen Alexis Silver, examine one of their captives and his Johnson before throwing him back into their  jungle jail. But on the way back to the lock-up, stacked warrior guard Alia Janine decides to find out what a man has to offer her so she jumps the hapless Hugo. It’s just the beginning of the male invasion and penetration of the Mamazons’ society and way of life. How you gonna keep ’em down on the farm after they’ve seen pee-pee?

Christy takes no prisoners.

Christy takes no prisoners.

And then there’s Christy Marks, a girl who can make a guy blast off just by sucking his finger and staring into his eyes. That’s already posted in a 69 (what else?) image pictorial.

Enjoy it all because it’ll be Monday before ya know it!

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Rating: 4.0/5

Get Yourself A Helping of Fruit!

June 14, 2010 by Maria 5 Comments

According to the USDA Food Guidelines, the average male needs at least two cups of fruit a day to maintain a healthy diet. Now, we don’t know about you, but for us, there are no two cups of fruit we’d rather have than the ones pictured right here. There is something almost mouthwatering about the way that Desirae offers you up a serving of that banana. Or the way that Ashley seems to be saying, “You seemed famished! Why don’t you come and eat some of my berries?”

I know staring at these pics makes me hungry!

Now, while I happen to think that playing with fruit in a sexual situation is very hot, there are a lot of big-boob lovers who don’t like any food in a model’s layout. They only want to see her melons and that’s that.

What kind of man are you? Do you mind foodplay in a pictorial? Do you find fruit sexy? Or when it comes to seeing your favorite busty beauties, do you object to produce?



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