Listen, I know I shouldn’t be going to AOL.com for news, but sometimes I do, and this tagline caught my eye: “Plunging Necklines Dominate SAG Awards,” SAG being the Screen Actors Guild. “Great,” I thought. “Big celebrity tits,” and right off, I should have thought, “Stupid me,” because what celebrity has big tits? I mean really big tits, other than Christina Hendricks from Mad Men, and even she isn’t SCORE big (although she’s welcome to find out).
So I took the leap. I clicked on the link, and that led me to,
Plunging Necklines Dominate the 2011 SAG Awards Red Carpet
once again, and this opening paragraph: “Plunging necklines and daring cleavage dominated the red carpet at the 2011 Screen Actors Guild (SAG) Awards with Sofia Vergara, Christina Hendricks and Eva Longoris leading the pack.” At which point my eye wandered to six photos of six celebrities, all of whom supposedly were wearing dresses with “plunging necklines” that exposed “daring cleavage.”
Bullshit. All I saw were five not-so-stacked celebrities with plunging necklines that didn’t reveal much and one semi-stacked chick (Christina) who was wearing the least-daring dress of all.
Meanwhile at USMagazine.com,
Cleavage Wars at the SAGs!
Of course, more disappointment. The website asked, “Who won this year’s cleavage awards?” and thank goodness some woman named Susan Zemitas Richmond was smart enough to comment, “The only one with any cleavage is Sofia Vergara. The others are just showing skin.”
Exactly. If you’re a boob man, you had about as much chance at jacking successfully to the SAG Awards as any of these women have of getting into SCORE.
NOTE TO THE REST OF THE WORLD: JUST BECAUSE A WOMAN IS WEARING A LOW-CUT DRESS OR TOP DOESN’T MEAN SHE’S SHOWING CLEAVAGE. IF YOU DON’T HAVE CLEAVAGE, YOU DON’T HAVE ANY TO SHOW! THERE’S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SKIN AND CLEAVAGE.
So, just to set the record straight. Cleavage:
Renee Ross
SaRenna Lee
Tiffany Towers
If any of these girls came walking down the red carpet at any awards show, the international media would have a collective heart attack and realize what actual cleavage is all about. And they’d realize that this has nothing to do with cleavage:
The diversity of opinions in the world of SCORE and Voluptuous never ceases to impress me. Some of the feedback we get is incredibly detailed. Even though we can’t possibly fulfill every wish, I still appreciate the interest and the motivation of the guys and gals who take the time to connect, especially these days when so much competes for our attention on a daily basis. I mean, I have a satellite TV subscription to a zillion channels and a subscription to a newspaper and several mags and I never mail these people any comments, opinions or feedback even though I’ve thought about it.
One of the bigger topics over the years that’s still going strong here is the bare feet vs heels issue. One of our regulars who calls himself “The Feetosopher” lives in Italy and is a prolific DVD buyer. He’s into bare feet and big tits. This is one of his more recent letters from the “Scorecard” reader forum in SCORELAND. He knows what he likes and even takes a statistical approach to the subject.
Melissa Mandlikova: she has nice buns, not bunions.
“Out of 106 full layouts you featured in 13 issues of Voluptuous in 2009, just 6 (I mean SIX!) included at least one (but often just one) picture in which the model’s bare feet were fully visible. This is less than 6% of the total number of layouts versus 20-30% in the 1997-2003 period even in the darkest period (2004-2008) you had never dipped below 9% of the total number of layouts. According to the poll you ran on SCORELAND, 23% of respondents like both boobs and feet in the layouts, and an additional 25% likes a mix (some boob-only layouts, some boob-and-feet layouts), it is quite apparent that you systematically disappoint at least 23% of them.”
The counterpointers have written that foot fans should stick to Leg Sex if they love feet that much. But The Feetosopher is a guy who likes to see the shoeless feet of busty girls, not only the feet of the more slinky, less curvy girls. I can relate because I like feet a lot myself although I’m a boob fan first. (I look at boobs first, feet and legs second, face third, ass fourth.) It’s just a fact that when a photographer is shooting a layout of a big-boobed girl, he’s got to think about her chest and often get close-up, not focus on her feet whether she is wearing shoes or not, and that means that a good portion of her legs and feet are not going to be in the picture. Otherwise, every photo would be a full-body shot.
My sole opinion about shoes is that if the model is going to wear her shoes throughout a layout and never kick them off, the shoes gotta be high, wild-looking and show a lot of toe cleavage. That’s why the girls wear what they wear at clubs. Sally Secretary shoes and low heels don’t cut it at all for me in a men’s mag pictorial or video. If that makes me an arch heel, so be it. I think we’ll still be dragging our feet about this topic ten years from now. Maybe one day, there will be a happy medium. Unless the boot crowd gains greater support. And we still have the ass, bush and pussy crowd to negotiate with.
F.C. gets the final word today: “Even if a man does not have a foot fetish, we like to see a woman’s feet. Feet are as expressive as hands, especially in the hardcore layouts and video. According to some American marketing research I read, six out of every ten men pay attention to women’s feet when we see an attractive girl in the street, and we like kissing and sucking our lover’s toes when we are having sex. You’ll notice some of your competitors go well out of their way to show the models’ feet. Yes, I know I can always buy your fine Leg Sex mags and DVD’s and I do own a few of them. But why do I have to choose between skinny-ass/small-titted babes in Leg Sex stuff or beautiful girls with big gazongas but no feet? Why can’t I have both big tits and feet?”
When you think of Terry Nova, feet don't come to mind.
Renee Ross has two big jugs and she’s proud of them.
Screw the turkey. Figuratively speaking, that is. The only three things that really count on a holiday weekend are babes, boobs and brew. And when all three are combined, you are treated to the vision of Renee Ross dressed in a beer-maid outfit from the Oktoberfest school of brew serving. I’ve seen those waitresses slinging seven steins at once, but we didn’t want to wear Renee out, and besides, Renee needed two free hands to peel off and play with herself. If only more tap-yankers looked and acted like Renee, and had kegs like hers, our lives would be so much easier. There are 78 more photos of Renee in “Boobfest” posted on SCORELAND. Bottoms up!
I remember the very first day Autumn-Jade visited the SCORE Studio in Miami. There was a high-energy vibe in the building. Autumn had never modeled in Miami. All of her videos and pictorials had been shot in London, England. The Alabama girl had been invited on the Boob Cruise, but for some reason or another, she couldn’t attend. I was always depressed about that. Then Autumn dropped out of sight until we located her again (it took several weeks of cold-calling) and invited her to model again. At the time, Autumn was house dancing at the Platinum Place in Memphis, Tennessee. Luckily, she returned our message.
To me, Autumn will always be one of the 20 greatest naturals. I’ve always loved the poses she could get into and her easygoing Southern charm and accent.
Autumn made a fine sperm-bank nurse.
“I worked in a chicken plant,” Autumn once told us. “A girlfriend of mine at the time told me that I could make money just by dancing in a bikini. We both went to the club in Huntsville, Alabama and auditioned, and they said we could both work. I quit my job the next week. Then I went from bikini to t-backs to topless, then I went to nude.”
That lousy chicken factory’s loss was the world’s gain. Autumn has since retired from modeling, but maybe one day she’ll get that urge again. Happy birthday, Autumn Jade.
And while we’re quoting models, here are the answers to yesterday’s Blog mystery quotes:
Christy Marks: “I mean, I’ve always known that a lot of guys out there like big boobs, but there’s something about the way SCORE treats them with respect, almost worships them, that I really like.”
Colt 45: “I’m not too conceited. I don’t own any gold or diamonds. I spend all of my money on my family trying to help them out. I’m more of a giver than a receiver. It makes me feel better about myself.”
Renee Ross: “I love to please men. I mean, I don’t mind being pleased, but for me, it is all about their pleasure.”
Maggie Green: “There was a guy who wanted to fly me to Egypt and buy me this giant ring. He sent pictures of himself and all these love letters I couldn’t understand because they were half in Egyptian, half in broken English, but they were kinda sweet.”
The following quotes were said by SCORE Girls during interviews. Do you know who said what?
Who said 1: “I mean, I’ve always known that a lot of guys out there like big boobs, but there’s something about the way SCORE treats them with respect, almost worships them, that I really like.”
Who said 2: “I’m not too conceited. I don’t own any gold or diamonds. I spend all of my money on my family trying to help them out. I’m more of a giver than a receiver. It makes me feel better about myself.”
Who said 3: “I love to please men. I mean, I don’t mind being pleased, but for me, it is all about their pleasure.”
Who said 4: “There was a guy who wanted to fly me to Egypt and buy me this giant ring. He sent pictures of himself and all these love letters I couldn’t understand because they were half in Egyptian, half in broken English, but they were kinda sweet.”
Victoria Lane is a great V-Girl, but does she belong in SCORE, too?
Every month, the editors of SCORE (me, Elliot, John Fox, etc.) make the most important decision ever made in adult magazine publishing: Which girls are going to be in that particular issue of the magazine. In fact, we met earlier today and discussed just that. And, once again, for maybe the upteenth time, we considered Victoria Lane for SCORE and decided, “She’s great. She’s a perfect Voluptuous model. But she isn’t a SCORE Girl.”
This is a painful decision for us because we love Victoria. I mean, just look at the girl. She’s super-curvy. She has G-cup naturals and a sexy face. But her measurements are 42-32-42, and that middle number–32–is one that doesn’t show up in SCORE too often. There have been times, such as recently with Renee Ross and Ashley Sage Ellison, when we pushed the envelope. Some of you were okay with that. But most of our readers responded with something along the lines of, “She’s great, but she doesn’t belong in SCORE.” One reader recently suggested that no model with a waist measurement of more than 30 inches should be allowed in SCORE. Okay, but we try not to base our decisions solely on numbers.
But we’re very careful about who goes into SCORE and who goes into V-Mag. We don’t want V-Mag to be the naturals-only version of SCORE. We don’t want SCORE to be a magazine for all girls with big tits.
Now, SCORELAND members don’t have to worry about this distinction because they get the girls from both magazines. But put on your editors cap for a second and tell us what you think: Should Victoria Lane go into SCORE?
Renee is so hot we need to use fireproof bedsheets.
If you’ve seen Renee Ross’s SCORELAND super-special “Wham! Bam! Thank You M’am!”, you’ll love this weekend’s video and pictorial, “Lust Weekend.” One of my favorite specials, I loved “Wham! Bam! Thank You M’am!” Renee is one of the hottest girls in V-Mag history. I love her beautiful face, dirty-talking mouth, 40J-cups and her plush body. Renee in Lust Weekend is, in one word, sensational. In two words, fuckin’ sensational. The sight of Renee’s tits bouncing back in her own face as she slides up and down the man-pole must be seen to be believed. What could be better than a Saturday with Renee?
According to a German researcher from the Hamburg Medical Research Institute, sex stimulates the brain and makes people more intelligent. He claims that sex not only excites the body but also the brain from the increased amount of hormones during orgasm. Try using this story the next time you want to get laid and let us know what happens. (“C’mon, honey, don’t you want to be smarter?”)
Now if looking at tits can also make you smarter, SCORELAND Guys should be brainiacs from this past week’s hotties. On Monday, Scarlett Rouge went to the doctor for a complete medical. The amazing Renee Ross roller-skated in on Tuesday (and she’s back on Saturday in a XXX full-sex hardcore man-woman shagarooney!). On Wednesday, Chavon Taylor arrived wrapped in a box, a virtual Living Doll.
Bella slides one up her wet slit.
Chica debuts on SCOREVideos.com.
And on Thursday, Bella Blaze set the room on fire.
We should be geniuses by the end of the year.
Over at SCOREVideos.com today, a new arrival with a bikini body and 32DDD cups has her first SCORE experience. Chica! Chica’s sex drive is off the charts. She’s only 19 years old with beautiful suckin’ titties. A second Chica XXX video will be showing at SCORELAND in a few weeks. We’ll keep ya posted.
